Grown Up Goldfish

 

I usually get Goldfish for my child since she likes them and Costco carries them, but when I was up at my parents for Christmas they had Cheez-Its and I realized they're kind of the same thing, just more boringly shaped. Such squares. Also, my toddler can sort of say "fish" and calls both Goldfish snacks and also actual fish in her 100 First Words book by the same word, and I'm not sure how she's picturing that - like does she think the cracker snack is an actual fish, or does she think the actual fish are cracker snacks? She really enjoyed going to the local Aquarium recently - was loving all the huge tanks and the fishes moving about in them. We got to see an unofficial dolphin show because they officially cancelled the performances but the dolphins still did their tricks at feeding time and we happened to be there for that. Then we realized it was our feeding time and wow the prices in there were classic Amusement Park pricing so we headed out and about to find a quick lunch. 

Text:
L: Cheez-ItsⓇ are just GoldfishⓇ that gave up on their dreams.

L2: *munching happily*

Stinking Dollars

 

Happy early Birthday to my brother!
Now I'm thinking of a scene where there's a mob boss type person telling a lackey to launder the money and then that guy just.... takes the suitcase of money and tosses it all into a machine at the local laundry mat. He returns with the bills all haphazardly stuffed back in the suitcase, still warm from the dryer. While waiting for the lackey to return, the boss is talking about how long it should take for the lackey to go to enough businesses to buy then sell items only to be surprised by said lackey with his suitcase full of warm money after a 30min wash and 45min dry. Now I'm thinking of a comic about this...

Text:
A: It costs three hundred stinking dollars?!?
L: If your money is stinking, maybe try laundering it. 

Sibling Ramblings

 

A slight continuation of the last comic, more of me and my brother after a tasty meal by our mom. The garlic sauce was great, but it was called garlic juice by someone then this spiral sort of happened. But from the previous comic, I now know that garlic soda is a thing in Switzerland. But now I need to look up if pasta soda is a thing, because that list of weird soda flavors has me questioning every ridiculous flavor as possibly being real. Ah, all the Google results are talking about baking soda in pasta, and that's not what I'm going for here. 

Text:
Title: Siblings
L: Garlic sauce.
L2: Garlic juice!
L: Pasta juice? 
L2: SodaStream that - carbonate those carbs!

Onion Soda

 

If ginger, which is a root, can be a soda (ale, which is basically synonymous with beer) then why not pick another root, onion, to be a soda? Does that mean that root beer is syntactically the same thing as ginger ale? And any root (potato, for example) could be SodaStreamed and called root beer? Things to ponder...

Also, I think this is an excellent example of why I should not ever get a SodaStream. I feel like carrot soda could be marketed to health nuts. Now I want to look up if carrot soda is a thing. The closest thing I could find is carrot cake soda, which is still quite odd but not in the health food category. WHAT THIS IS WEIRDER: both onion and garlic sodas are a thing per this article. Wait, now my comic is about an already made product... I'm not sure how to feel about that.

Text:
L: You've heard of ginger ale, now get ready for:
L2: Onion soda.
L: If you can liquidize it, you can carbonate it!
M: *facepalm* 

Cooking Disturbed

 

Happy Birthday to my niece!
This is a continuation from last week's comic. And now, I really want to write a recipe where this is a step. I mean, if "cook undisturbed" is valid, then the opposite should be, too! And who doesn't want a little disturbance - never mind, disturbances in the kitchen usually means something gets burnt due to chasing after a toddler or trying to clean up a mess or whatnot.  

Text:
L: So that needs to cook undisturbed for 3 minutes, then add this and cook disturbed for 1-2 minutes.
M: I'm pretty sure the recipe says "stir frequently" for that last part.

Settle the Child

 

This came up because my family likes to play table top games in the evening (usually card but sometimes board). My Mark didn't get this on first read but then it connected, which means I probably need an explanation. To "settle" a child is to help them calm down, usually for a nap or bedtime but sometimes just to calm down from a freak-out. "Settlers of Catan," often abbreviated "Settlers," is a board game where you gain resources by trading or luck of the dice in order to build your settlement. Some of those resources are sheep and wheat (also ore, wood, and brick). Fun fact, the first time I played Settlers was at a year-end vacation (at Word of Life) and the deck was partially in German for some reason but the pictures were clear what they meant. 

Text:
M: Can I help you settle the toddler?
L: She needs two sheep and a wheat.
L2: *crying*

Grandma's House

 I admit, I will eat so much more dairy at my Grandma's house than my usual (very low) amount because her desserts are just too amazing to pass up! Her éclair cake is delicious and her ice cream cakes are the best and cannoli and so many amazing treats... I do pack a whole sheet of Lactaid pills when we go up to visit. It's just smart. I know my weakness. 

Explanation: I am lactose intolerant but this developed during my college years so I know how amazing dairy tastes but now it is a forbidden food. I make allowances for childhood favorites (basically everything my Grandma makes) by taking Lactaid pills, which usual provide what my body needs to process dairy (but not always, for some reason, so it's a tossup if I'll feel ill afterwards). 

Text:
L: We're going to Grandma's, you know what that means! *holding a sheet of Lactaid pills* 

Cooking Undisturbed

 It sounds better to say "stir frequently" rather than "cook disturbed" but now I want to insert that into a recipe somehow. I'm also realized there could be a comic about a mom telling her toddler to leave because the recipe says "cook undisturbed" and that means no children clamoring for attention. 

Text:
L1: Cook undisturbed for five minutes.
L2: Nothing in this house is undisturbed.

Flights Impacted

 Was anyone else impacted by the Southwest Airlines mess? Thankfully we were staying with family and also we were able to flip our tickets to the train (that's in a later comic) so we were by no means stranded. But we were suppose to fly out on a Wednesday and they said how about Sunday? However my amazing husband was able to get us train tickets right away and that worked out (praise the Lord we even found seats next to each other in the carriages very full with multitudes of other people were in the same proverbial boat which was actually a train instead of an airplane). 

Whenever I hear the word "impacted" I think of wisdom teeth. Impaction is just not good, especially when it requires surgery. 

Text:
M: Southwest says our travel has been impacted by their issues.
L: How badly?
M: Like wisdom teeth.

Mala-Chai

 

Is it flowing with milk and honey? Do all Biblical cafés overdo the milk and honey? I am trying to think of the name of the restaurant in The Bible Museum but I'm gonna double-check via Google to say YES it is Milk + Honey Café. Oh, the restaurant way upstairs is called Manna but their café is by the entry and is open to all. I think I have only gone to the restaurant and not the café but I could be wrong. I'm heading back to the museum this month because !!! they are putting on a production of The Horse and His Boy and I'm excited to see how they do it. I recently listened to the whole Narnia series via audiobooks mainly on vacation drives over last summer but finished up the last few on my own at home with my toddler bopping about. 

Back to the comic - my pastor recently finished a sermon series going through Malachi and this comic sprang to mind. Tea was on my mind, as it tends to be. "Chai" is a common spicy tea blend made to be served with milk, and I was thinking about the name "Malachi" and how I once heard a kid pronounce it like "ma-LA-chee" then I thought "chai" and the comic happened.

Text:
A: What's your favorite tea at this Biblical café? 
B: The Mala-Chai.

Stage Isn't Set

 

My pastor was explaining a passage and said that the first few verses were setting the stage for the three-part sermon and this comic sprang to mind.  Jello can take a while to set - I have no clue how long a whole stage floor would take (obviously it would depend on the size of the stage and the temperature of the room - it would need to be fairly chilly). 

Text:
A: You covered the entire floor in JELLO?!?!?!
S: Don't go out there! The stage isn't ... set. :)

Run the Numbers

 

I honestly don't recall what sparked this comic, but I'd like to see it used in a business setting. I feel like it could be a conversation between an evil overlord/CEO and his chief underling/CFO. 

CEO: Run the numbers!
CFO: They refuse to run.
CEO: Then walk them!

Introvert New Year

 

Happy New Year!
New Year, new reminder that it's good to look through your social media and reconsider if you really know those people. Or if you really need those apps. Why not just turn your phone on Do Not Disturb? 

What is *deleting social media* - for some it could be trimming down your friends lists/follows, for others it could be deleting the app on your phone, for others it could be deactivating your accounts. For a select few, it could mean actually taking down the sites. You do you. 

Explanation: A popular song at New Years is "Auld Lang Syne" which starts with the text "Should Old Acquaintance be forgot" which I parody in this comic. Also, fun fact, there's a hymn that uses the tune of this song but with (some would say) better lyrics and I like it - we sing it at my church. 

Text:
Title: Introvert New Year
L: 🎵 Let old acquaintances be forgot and never brought to mind! 🎵
phone: *Deleting social media*

Getting Kicked on Route 66

 

In the last comic of the year, I reflect on a trip earlier in the year when we had the joy of experiencing Route 66 for a quick getaway to VA. Well, it would have been a quick getaway if there hadn't been multiple construction zones that we needed to pass through. But it was a nice getaway, once we got there. 

Text:
M: Traffic and construction everywhere! This highway is horrible!
L: Are we getting kicked on Route 66?
M: Yes.

Life is a Gridlocked Highway

 

I heard this song on the radio and this comic sprang to mind. I might have even been sitting in traffic. It might have been a Thursday since this is quite a throwback of a song - it was popular like when I was in college which was forever ago. But pre-pandemic seems forever ago as well. Maybe the past just seems a long time ago, whether or not it was a few years or a decade or longer. 

Text:
A: 🎵 Life is a Highway 🎵
B: Gridlocked and going nowhere fast?