Thursday, February 29, 2024

Fishy Advice

enable images please

Happy Leap Day! Enjoy the extra February-ness. Maybe don't take this comic's advice - it seems fishy.

Explanation: Clams, oysters, and mussels are all shellfish. "Clamming up" is a phrase but I'm pretty sure "oystering up" is not. And "mussel" sounds like "muscle", and "muscle through it" means to press on despite obstacles. 

Text:
RF: Don't clam up!
BF: Should I oyster up?
PF: Mussel through it!

Tuesday, February 27, 2024

Thank and Excuse

 enable images please

I had my second ever successful jury summons recently and I wrote about it on my other blog, Not So Comical - http://notsocomical.comicaltruestory.com/2024/02/jury-duty.html 

I support the trial by a jury of your peers system, but I don't want to go through the process any more than I have to. I just find it interesting that I was called once right when I turned 18 but I was away at college so I got excused, then nothing for over a decade, then basically back-to-back summons in the sense that I was summoned three years after getting my first successful summons, so right after I got put back in the pool. I know it's not really back-to-back - my sister had that when somehow she was summoned three times in one calendar year - but it feels like it. Also I wonder if now I'm gonna get summoned every three years - somehow they just didn't notice me when I moved to my current state about 15 years ago? But my husband has lived here all his life and has never been successfully summoned (he has been called up twice but was excused or not needed). So it's odd how some people are summoned more frequently than others. 

Explanation: When selecting a jury, either side of the court case can excuse a potential juror with the phrase (at least this is the phrase they used in my recent summons) "please thank and excuse juror #" and I just think that's a great way to dismiss someone's opinion. 

Text:
A: I love jury duty - I think we should get back on the list every year, not every three years!
B: Please thank and excuse your opinion.

Sunday, February 25, 2024

Engaged Parenting

 enable images please

Our pastor was talking about engaged parenting as the opposite of absentee parenting, but when I hear engaged I think proposal and that means a ring is required. But our pastor was speaking on 1 Corinthians 4:14-21, with the title "Parental Guidance Required" and you can find his sermon on SermonAudio under faithbiblemd.

Text:
A: Why did your wife give you a solitaire ring?
B: She wants me to be more engaged in parenting.

Thursday, February 22, 2024

Reckless Abandon

enable images please

I don't remember where I heard someone use the phrase "reckless abandon" but it sparked this comic. Also, if you're not reckless are you reckful? Like the opposite of careless is careful? You should be reckful rather than reckless? Also it's a real question - is there another type of abandon?  

Text:
A: With reckless abandon?
B: Is there any other type?

Tuesday, February 20, 2024

Have the Halves

 enable images please

The ability to finish someone's sentence is really not that hard - it's finishing it correctly that's difficult.

Explanation: The proper phrase is "haves and have nots" but "haves" sounds like "halves" and clearly halves are paired with wholes. 

Text:
A: In every scenario, there are the haves and -
B: The wholes, yes.

Sunday, February 18, 2024

Gaming Mouse

enable images please

I'm not sure I like how I drew the mice here - this is a stick figure blog for a reason. But the joke needed mice! So the mice are here. Also this was inspired by my husband getting a gaming mouse with cool colors in it. 

Explanation: A gaming mouse is a fancy computer mouse that has features beneficial for online gaming. Dota and Halo are popular games. A mouse (mammal) that plays games all day could also be called a gaming mouse. 

Text:
A: All he does is play Dota and Halo all day long.
B: What did you expect? He's a gaming mouse.

Thursday, February 15, 2024

Love and Star Wars

 enable images please

I often struggle to come up with comics for holidays, but this one came to me out of the blue, like a bolt of lightning (from the sky not the sith kind). How would the Jedi handle static electricity? Would the younglings shuffle their feet across the carpet then cackle evilly while zapping their friends? I feel like I should write to Mr. Lucas (not my brother but actually he might have a solid opinion on this) and see what his take is. 

Text:
LS: Leia, she touched my hand and sparks flew 💗
LO: Luke, that means she's a sith! That's Force Lightning! 

Tuesday, February 13, 2024

Light Headed

enable images please

I think if you glowed when light-headed, it would make everything worse. But then people would know when you're not feeling well in that exact way so that could be helpful. I hope you can see in the comic that she is glowing - there are faint yellow lines around her head like sunrays. 

Explanation: "Radiant" is a compliment but also means "sending out light," and "light-headed" means you feel like passing out. Yay for "light" meaning "not weighing much" and also "bright." 

Text:
M: You look positively radiant!
L: I am feeling rather light-headed. *sunrays around head*

Sunday, February 11, 2024

Super Bowl Players

 enable images please

I am surprised that "Taylor Swift" showed up in my tags and now I'm wondering what other comics I've made about her. Here they are! 1 2 3

I'm really not into sports so I was unaware of who made it to the big game, other than not my local team. Also I'm pretty sure TSwift isn't doing the Half Time Show but she's being talked about more than whoever's doing that so yeah that's how this comic happened.

Text:
A: Who's playing in the Super Bowl?
B: Taylor Swift.

Thursday, February 8, 2024

Big Farmer

enable images please

This post is neither in favor of or against the Jolly Green Giant and/or Big Pharma. It's just having fun with accents turning words into other words which facilitates a joke. 

Explanation: Bostonian accents (like most New England ones) drops the 'r's in words usually, so "farmer" turns into "fa'ma'" which sounds like "pharma" which is short for pharmacy. And the Jolly Green Giant was the biggest farmer I could recall. 

Text:
A: If you're going to rant about Big Pharma, please say it with a Boston accent so I can picture the Jolly Green Giant as the subject of your ire. 

Tuesday, February 6, 2024

VROOOM

 please enable images

Happy Birthday to my brother-in-law!

This was inspired by true events. I don't understand what there is to like about loud cars, but I did have a slightly loud car back in the day because it had hard engine mounts and those are a big job to replace, or so I was told. The car gave you a massage while you idled, it was as bonus feature!

Text:
Background: VROOOM!
A: They do not have a muffler.
B: What??

Sunday, February 4, 2024

Counter Productivity

enable images please

But is he making a greater number of these kitchen prep surfaces for his company's business competitor, therefore making his counter productivity counter productive? 

Text:
A: I have made so many kitchen prep surfaces.
B: You're very counter productive. 

Thursday, February 1, 2024

First Word

 enable images please :)

Any day now I'm sure Ori will say his first dinosaur name. Robin, who's nearly 3, has been learning dinosaur names and it's super cute to hear her say 'patasaurus or pterodactyl or really any of them. She's at the stage where she points at literally everything (it seems) and asks "this one?" meaning "what is this called?" and so I've been trying to get her to say all the dinosaur names as we have numerous dinosaurs about the house (books, figurines, magnets, ...).

Explanation: Most kids have "dada" as their first D word, and also usually their first word. 

Text:
O: D-d-d-
P: Is he going to say-
O: Diplodocus!

Tuesday, January 30, 2024

End of Month

 enable images please

WHAT?!? 

The thing with getting ahead and scheduling posts is that you're only as ahead as you've scheduled, and that lead time is constantly shrinking. How obnoxious. 

Text:
L: No worries, I have comics scheduled through the end of the month.
M: But it is the end of the month.
L: WHAT!?

Sunday, January 28, 2024

Headlamp Etiquette

please enable images

Do you see a problem with this? Neither does the new construction worker. 

Explanation: If your headlamp is at eye level, it's covering your eyes. It's meant to be on your forehead. 

Text:
B: I'm ready for my first day on the construction site!
S: Don't forget to wear your headlamp at eye level.

Thursday, January 25, 2024

Modern 12 Drones of Christmas

 enable images please

Happy early Birthday to my brother! 
If they're all birds, and birds aren't real, then did your true love give you nothing??? Also, as I figured out in my previous 12 Days of Christmas comic, if you do the additive version then it's 364 drones. You could make a cool lights show with that many. 

Explanation: people wearing tinfoil hats are (usually?) conspiracy theorists, and a popular conspiracy is that birds aren't real. 

Text:
A: How was your Christmas?
B: Excellent, my true love gave me a modern 12 Days of Christmas so -
A: 78 drones?!
B: Yep!

Tuesday, January 23, 2024

Strainers vs Stressors

 enable images please

It's always a hunt to find kitchen utensils in someone else's kitchen. This comic was spawned over Christmas at my parents' place. So many cooks, but it's a nice open kitchen. 

Text:
D: I can't find the strainer!
A: We only have stressors here.

Sunday, January 21, 2024

Toddler Communication

 enable images please

Many times I (and others) can't understand what my darling toddler is saying. Sometimes, like in this comic, she is helpful and gives context clues and additional noises to help make the connection. But most times she just says the same sounds and I'm like, I haven't a clue what "eesh" means so can you point or give a few more clues? It's like playing Mad Gab with someone who just says the words the same exact way over and over and gets frustrated when you don't get it. 

I just remembered that Robin started off calling dogs "woof woofs" because that's easier than the real word, and later progressed to calling them "goggies," so when her friend couldn't understand her newer word she just fell back on her previous one. Hmmmm. Or maybe she just did the sound. It's hard to really know. But the interaction was quite funny because her friend has excellent diction in three languages but apparently doesn't understand toddler English, which is all Robin has. 

Text:
R: Goggy!
N: What is a goggy?
R: ... woof woof. 

Thursday, January 18, 2024

Should Have Paid Attention

 please enable images
Happy almost Birthday to my niece!
This one was inspired by a family gathering where there were people chilling and people who wanted to play complicated games. And the second group needed more people so an attempt was made to make someone stop chilling. It was only partially successful. But a good time was still had by all. 

Text:
A: *Explaining rules to a game*
P: That sounded like something I Should have been paying attention to but I wasn't. 

Tuesday, January 16, 2024

Stamp Your Beet

please enable images

There's a photo I've seen circulated with the text "If you're happy and you know it" and the image is a spiral ham in a C-clamp (i.e. "clamp your hams"). I then thought of this successor, "stamp your beet" (i.e. "stomp your feet"). I did not realize there are many variations of this song until I compiled a playlist of kid songs for my toddler. Many people sing the same songs but often there are some changes. "A stamp costs way more than 32¢!" you say. Well, congrats on knowing that there is a money amount connected to stamps. Also, they use to be cheaper, as that's how inflation and such things work. I didn't make it a forever stamp because drawing one would be more complicated than what I did. 

Explanation: The song "If You're Happy and You Know It" has several verses of what to do to show your happiness, including clapping your hands and stomping your feet. "Stomp your feet" sounds similar to "stamp your beet" much like how "clap your hands" sounds like "clamp your hams." 

Text:
If you're happy and you know it...
[image of a beet with a stamp on it]

Sunday, January 14, 2024

13th Day of Christmas

 enable images please

I did the math, that's 78 birds if you ascribe to the "they're all birds" theory of the 12 Days of Christmas and you don't repeat the birds (i.e. on day two you just get the 2 doves, not the partridge again). That is an excessive amount of birds, whether they are for a menagerie or a feast. And if you do the additive version, where you get all the previous days on top of the new day's gift each day, that's 364 birds. That's a lot of birdseed.

Text:
Title: After the 12th Day of Christmas
W: Finally, the Amazon package that I have been expecting for two weeks!
TL: Is it birdseed? 'Cause we need a bit of that.

Thursday, January 11, 2024

CT Rest Stop

 enable images please

I really like the mouseover in this one. Check it out. 

We traveled to CT over Christmas and we did see a rest stop with just a DD listed and we did not stop there. We prefer a selection of foods when we stop, but then again we have little kiddos so sometimes you just have to take the exit. I do like that the rest stops on the NJ Turnpike are getting renovated - the new ones are quite nice. One had the best changing table station I have ever seen in a public restroom, which might not be saying much but a nice countertop with a ledge and a garbage bin not near the door / high traffic area - it was just right. Sadly I don't recall the name of the stop, but maybe that's a new blueprint more places will use. Way better than the flimsy fold-down koala care ones. But sometimes you're just grateful to have a place to change the baby. 

Text:
M: This rest stop only has a Dunkin? 
L: Welcome to CT! 
R and O: *along for the ride*

Tuesday, January 9, 2024

Late Lunch

 enable images please

So one of my migraine triggers is if I don't eat at regularly scheduled times - namely I need my three meals each in their own two-hour window of morning, noon, and evening. I discovered this trigger when studying why I was regularly getting migraines on the weekends - once I fixed my sleeping in to a point where my breakfast was within two hours of when I normally eat it on weekdays, the migraines stopped being triggered. It was enlightening. Due to this limitation, if I go to a brunch I usually eat a light breakfast beforehand. If I go to a fancy afternoon meal that's basically a lunner? dinch? there isn't a word for this that I know of - I thought repass was generic but a quick check shows that's just after a funeral. Let's not make it a thing and instead we can eat lunch around noon and dinner around 6. In between those times is snack time. 

Explanation: I can't wait until 2pm for my midday meal - I need it between 11am and 1pm - so usually on holidays I just get some granola or PB or trail mix to hold me over until the big meal. Also, I don't care how big the lunch was, I still need dinner between 5pm and 7pm. When is breakfast you ask? Between 7am and 9am. If it slides early, I'll need a 10am snack. Sometimes I need a 10am snack anyway. 3pm snacks are good too. 

Text:
M: What do we need to grab before going over to the 2pm meal?
L: Lunch. 

Sunday, January 7, 2024

In Cahoots

enable images please

Happy Birthday to my brother-in-law! 

If I were to make a fashion label, it would need to be something punny like this. I also think it's weird how at the big fancy gatherings, the media asks "who are you wearing" like the outfit is the embodiment of a person. Which, I mean, some fashion designers are very connected to their artistic expressions, but it's still weird to me. 

Text:
R: That's an interesting outfit - who are you wearing?
C: I'm in CahootsⓇ.

Thursday, January 4, 2024

Fine Motor Skills

enable images please!

My little Oriole is working on his fine motor skills, it's like one day he's crying because he wants something he can't reach and then the next day he's just crawling over to get whatever he wants. Also, baby grip strength should not be underestimated. Tis very strong. 

Explanation: "Fine motor skills" refers to babies learning how to use their hands distinctly to do tasks other than just smacking things around. "Motor skills" would imply something with cars. 

Text:
L: *holding O*
M: Little man is working on his fine motor skills.
B: He's already driving?!?!

Tuesday, January 2, 2024

Hide-A-Key

 enable images please!

Crashing into the new year :) Happy New Year! Don't use a brick as your spare key.
This comic came about because I saw a brick outside the glass front doors of a building and thought, that's poor placement. The brick was often used as a door stopper, but I suggested they move the brick to the inside of the building as that would discourage poor yet pricy decisions. 

Explanation: French doors have a lot of glass panes. Bricks are stronger than a glass pane. Throwing the brick through the door to open said door is a rather permanent way to unlock it. 

Text:
A: Is the brick by your French doors a hide-a-key?
B: No, it's the spare key.