Thursday, June 29, 2023

Chicago Problems

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♪♪"Scruff McGruff, Chicago Illinois, 60612"♪♪

Why do the jingles from your childhood stay with you for life? How did Scruff McGruff take a bite out of crime? So many questions. I never watched the tv show (I only realized there was one when I looked up how to spell his name because I figured it was like this but wanted to check because you know how you think something is one way your whole life then you get fact checked and your world is rocked?) but I heard the commercial about "taking a bite out of crime" so many times. I don't recall the plan to take a bite out of crime, but I knew the name of the bloodhound detective and his city, state, zip. Not sure if that was enough to mail something to him - maybe it was? What would you even mail to him - I guess evidence of a crime? Many questions remain. I don't recall the article that my husband was reading that made him give the above statement, if I did then I would link it here. But I don't think it's a disputed fact that Chicago has a crime problem. 

M: Chicago has a crime problem.
L: But Scruff McGruff lives there!!!

Tuesday, June 27, 2023

Waffle Math

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The recipe I use is this one and it's simple and tasty. I add spices to it to, ah, spice it up but it's a great plain waffle recipe. I have two waffle irons - a Captain America shield one (makes one shield at a time) and a dinosaur one (it makes five mini dino waffles at a time). To help the morning run smoothly, I make the batter the night before and my Mark cooks it up in the morning. 

L2: Should I make two batches of waffle batter?
L1: How much does one batch make?
L2: Four captains and ten dinosaurs, where five dinos equal one captain.
L3: Eat!!

Sunday, June 25, 2023

Toddler Dentist

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So it actually went well which was unexpected and very nice! Our dentist has a tiny chair, perfect for a toddler to watch what's going on while Dad gets his teeth cleaned, and they had her sit on his lap in the chair so they could take a peek at her teeth and get her acclimated to the tools like the water squirter and the suction tool (Mr. Thirsty). I waited in the waiting room with our baby because I wasn't sure if the toddler was going to tolerate the appointment, but she did not need rescuing! I heard the hygienist counting my husband's teeth, much to my toddler's delight. 

I'm trying something different in this post in that I'm leaving the comic image at the default "medium" instead of increasing it to "large" - I was thinking it comes through a little pixelated in the emails that send out when it's "large" so I want to see how this looks. 
UPDATE: So the size change didn't seem to change anything with emails BUT it does make the comics a bit small on the website so I'm going back to setting them all as large. So no change anymore. 

L: Are you ready to bring our toddler to the dentist?
M: Who knows how it will go!
L: I think I know how it will go...
L2: *oblivious to the impending dental visit* 

Thursday, June 22, 2023

Favorite Color Confusion

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So this came up because my husband's work had a lunch which had an unexpected "ice breaker" section and my man really dislikes being put on the spot and also dislikes picking favorites so I think he was able to just avoid the questions but one of the questions was "what's your favorite color" and I thought up this. 

Explanation: "Charcuterie" is a plate of cold meats and cheese, maybe with olives and such, usually used as an appetizer at events. "Chartreuse" is a shade of green named after a green liqueur (for some reason I always think chartreuse is a dark red, it just seems like that should be what it is, but rather it's a bright green so I'm totally wrong with my thinking there). 

A: What is your favorite color?
M: Charcuterie!
A: ... Do you mean chartreuse?
M: Nope!

Tuesday, June 20, 2023

Dairy Interactions: Sugar

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True Story - we were at a buffet restaurant and the waitress asked if we would like ice cream because they serve that for you and this happened. I usually ask for clarification when the server doesn't seem to take "non-dairy" seriously or something just seems off. I'm glad I did ask for clarification because sugar-free and dairy-free are very different things and I can't tolerate one of those (or really both because I do like my sugar and usually sugar-free means they're using something as a sugar replacement that is probably bad in its own way). 

My other comics about Dairy Interactions: 1 2 3 sadly I forgot to add the header to this one and I'm not sure it will fit with how much text there is so *shrug*.

W: Would you like ice cream?
L: Do you have dairy-free?
W: Yes, vanilla.
L: ... it's dairy-free?
W: Yes, well it's sugar-free.
L: Yet still from a cow.

Sunday, June 18, 2023

Pride and Joy

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Happy Father's Day to all fathers, especially my father, my father-in-law, my grandfather, and my husband! I am very blessed by the strong fathers in my family. Can't forget my brother-in-laws! They are excellent uncles to my kiddos. Someday my brothers could be fathers and that's just a weird concept for me to grasp because in my mind they are the little kiddos that saw me off to college - I kinda struggle to see them as adults but that's what they are now. No more thinking about that! Reach out to the excellent fathers in your life and tell them that they are excellent! 

Explanation: A group of lions is called a pride. A common phrase when talking about your beloved children is "my pride and joy." 

Father lion: You all are not only my pride, but also my joy.
Cub 1: Daaaad
Cub 2: Stop, you're embarrassing us. 

Thursday, June 15, 2023

Whine Cellar

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The salesperson in the previous comic sold the whine cellar to this fellow. Everybody needs a place to voice their complaints? My toddler has started whining a lot in the car and it's quite unbearable. She tosses her toys away from her car seat then whines like she's bored. I'm like, girl, the solution was in hand and you rejected it. And she's like, whiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine. It's not the best time being had. 

A: Why do your kids go into your basement to voice their complaints?
B: It's the whine cellar.

Tuesday, June 13, 2023

Biers and Cellars

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One of those is more of a niche market than the other. But how do you sell a cellar to someone? That seems like a cart before the horse situation, but I'm not totally sure how to use that phrase so I could be wrong. 

Explanation: "Biers" sounds like "buyers" and "cellars" sounds like "sellers." A common phrase is "buyers and sellers." 

A: You specialize in flammable funeral rites and also underground storage?
B: Yep, Biers and Cellars!

Sunday, June 11, 2023

Alligator Tears

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Why does everyone call fake tears "crocodile tears"? Also, I always have to look up the difference between a crocodile and an alligator. They are both nopes in my book and I hope to never see either in the wild. 

H: Quit your crocodile tears!
A: I'm an alligator!

Thursday, June 8, 2023


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I believe there is a quote from Downton Abbey where the actress who played Professor McGonagall asks "what is a weekend?" (I haven't seen the show but I've seen enough clips to get the main gist of it I think) and after reading something about back-end development vs front-end, I came up with this comic. 

Explanation: In software development, there's front-end and back-end (among many other things). The character in this comic is adding a third option, weekend, i.e. do you prefer not being at work. There is a misunderstanding since "week" and "weak" sound the same. 

A: Do you prefer front-end, back-end, or weekend? :)
B: What is weak-end?

Tuesday, June 6, 2023

Accounting Book

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This came up because my sister-in-law gave an adorable book to my daughter, and Lucy loves to "read" it and I find it enjoyable to read to her. You can guess the title by the blurb mentioned in the comic :) It actually does a surprisingly good summary of the book in just 10 pages, using the numbers 1-10. Also, it only has the number and the item (i.e. six fingers) with the illustration on each page, so I'm able to read it at the pace my daughter flips the pages (not a feat achievable in most books). 

Explanation: "a counting book" is a common book for young readers which teaches them to count, usually from 1 to 10. "accounting book" would be something a college student studying accounting would have, and would not be appropriate reading for a toddler. The two, however, sound the same. 

M: She's reading a counting book from her aunt.
N: An accounting book?!? She's two!!!
L: Six fingers!

Sunday, June 4, 2023

Pomegranate Pool

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I heard this fact and thought this thing. The tip is intending you to just put the pomegranate in like a bowl of water, submerged while you break it apart. Then the fruit juices don't squirt all over the place, leaving red streaks across your cabinets and ceilings and such. Fun times cleaning all that up. But I guess opening the fruit in a pool would qualify, it would just leave a red streaky mess in the pool and yeah that might be worse. 

A: I like pomegranates, but opening them up makes such a mess.
B: Oh, you can break them open under water to limit the juice spray!
A: So like, in the pool?

Thursday, June 1, 2023

Spicy Ice Cream

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So I was at my in-laws and my mom-in-law like plain vanilla ice cream but most others would prefer some mix-ins like chocolate chips or similar. However, the question was phrased just like so, and therefore I had to suggest some spices. Savory ice cream is... probably a thing? Now I need to look it up. So technically yes, there are savory ice creams but I disagree with the list HERE because I don't think some of them like the PB&J one count as savory - grape is a fruit and PB is used in many desserts? But yeah roasted garlic would be savory and also does not sound enjoyable to me. 

N: Bleh, plain vanilla ice cream. Do we have anything to spice this up?
L: Paprika?
N: ?!?
L: ... smoked paprika?