Because I Want To

So my preschooler often explains her reasoning with simply "because I want to" and yeah that's not what we're looking for usually. This is basically a Christmas comic because around Christmastime there are SO MANY GOODIES that have dairy and are SO hard to resist. 

Text:
M: That has dairy - should you be eating that?
L: Nope.
M: Why are you eating that?
L: Because I want to.
M: Wow, quoting the three-year-old. 

Seis Leches

Happy early Birthday to my mom!

So Tres Leches Cake has, as the name is, three types of milk in it - evaporated milk, condensed milk, and whole milk. I recently learned of Seis Leches Cake, which has six types of milk in it BUT two of them are non-dairy - sweetened condensed, evaporated, heavy cream, coconut milk, condensed coconut milk and dulce de leche. I'm lactose intolerant so the dairy would not be good for me. I need a dos leches cake with just the coconut and condensed coconut...

Explanation: "leche" means "milk" in Spanish so if you're trying to avoid dairy, don't eat any cake with that word in the title. 

Text:
M: Want some tres leches cake? 
L: There's 3 reasons I can't have that.
M: What about seis leches cake?
L: Surprisingly only 4 reasons I can't have that. 

Dairy Interactions: Sugar

 

True Story - we were at a buffet restaurant and the waitress asked if we would like ice cream because they serve that for you and this happened. I usually ask for clarification when the server doesn't seem to take "non-dairy" seriously or something just seems off. I'm glad I did ask for clarification because sugar-free and dairy-free are very different things and I can't tolerate one of those (or really both because I do like my sugar and usually sugar-free means they're using something as a sugar replacement that is probably bad in its own way). 

My other comics about Dairy Interactions: 1 2 3 sadly I forgot to add the header to this one and I'm not sure it will fit with how much text there is so *shrug*.

Text:
W: Would you like ice cream?
L: Do you have dairy-free?
W: Yes, vanilla.
L: ... it's dairy-free?
W: Yes, well it's sugar-free.
L: Yet still from a cow.

Hot Chips

 

Happy Birthday to my father-in-law!

I'm almost done with my comics from my Christmas trip to visit my parents. Such good comic material when families gather together. Bleh having food intolerances is annoying but once you figure out what makes you feel bad it is nice to be able to avoid that feeling. And I do like chips so just eating them is fine rather than adding the extras on top. Potato chips are superior to corn chips, but both are salty and crunchy and that's nice. 

Text:
L: I'm making nachos, but I can leave the cheese and spicy off some for you.
L2: ... I don't want hot chips.

Grandma's House

 I admit, I will eat so much more dairy at my Grandma's house than my usual (very low) amount because her desserts are just too amazing to pass up! Her éclair cake is delicious and her ice cream cakes are the best and cannoli and so many amazing treats... I do pack a whole sheet of Lactaid pills when we go up to visit. It's just smart. I know my weakness. 

Explanation: I am lactose intolerant but this developed during my college years so I know how amazing dairy tastes but now it is a forbidden food. I make allowances for childhood favorites (basically everything my Grandma makes) by taking Lactaid pills, which usual provide what my body needs to process dairy (but not always, for some reason, so it's a tossup if I'll feel ill afterwards). 

Text:
L: We're going to Grandma's, you know what that means! *holding a sheet of Lactaid pills* 

One Time At Five Guys

 

A few weeks ago, a group from my church went to a Corn Maize. On the way there, we stopped at our usual Chick-fil-A only to realize they didn't have seating available due to Covid restrictions so we looked where else locally we could eat. We settled on Five Guys and this super helpful conversation happened between me, my husband, and my brother-in-law (both who fully know I'm lactose intolerant). And my husband knows I don't normally eat hot dogs (I honestly can't remember the last time I had one) - kielbasa is so much better. I had a really good wurst last week at a local German place which is know for their schnitzel (but all their food is delicious). But at Five Guys I had a little hamburger with some toppings and the five of us split two fries. 

Text:
Title: FIVE GUYS
L: What should I get?
M: Bacon cheese dog!
N: With a milkshake!
L: You know me so... little. 

Dole Whip

Happy St. Patrick's Day! Also, Happy Half-Birthday to ME!!! Maybe we'll go out for Irish food like we usually do on my half-birthday. It's a great tradition.
There is a restaurant near me (Peri-Peri, also known as Nando's) which has a Dole Whip machine and one day I was wanting dessert and I thought hey, it's dairy-free and I'm lactose intolerant so I can have it! But then I realized the Dole in the name stands for pineapple, which I am mildly allergic to (I won't die, I'll just be uncomfortable as my mouth will be itchy for hours) so I didn't get any.
But there are other desserts I can and do enjoy, like this sleeve of Oreos which are dairy-free. I was going to save a few for Mark when he gets home from basketball but I have eaten all 6 which actually is good so I won't tempt him with them. I'm helping!

Text:
L: Dole Whip is dairy-free!
L: But it's pineapple. *facepalm*

Dairy Interactions: Soy

Yet again, a very true story. She stated it very matter-of-factly. I just rolled with it. I get that people think all milk comes from a cow, but there just isn't a word for milk alternatives.

Text:
A: Do you have non-dairy milk?
B: No. We only have whole, skim, and soy.
A: ... Ok, soy please.

Dairy Interactions: Salad

Yet again a very true story - they remade my salad but the waitress acted kinda surprised that I wanted no cheese on my salad AND no cheese in my dressing. I believe people are under the impression that only people trying to lose weight would avoid dairy instead of realizing that there are many people who just can't eat it.

Text:
A: I asked for no cheese on my salad.
B: We didn't put cheese on your salad. That cheese is from the dressing on the salad.

Dairy Interactions: Skim

Sadly a true story. I now know to just say almond and they usually will suggest a proper alternative, but not always. It is annoying to be lactose intolerant, but there are many worse health issues out there, like being actually allergic to dairy.

Text:
A: Do you have non-dairy milk?
B: So like, skim?
A: ...No.

Dairy Free Grilled Cheese

It's not easy being lactose intolerant.

Chick-Fil-A

I kinda want to do this but they probably won't find it funny. Also, the associate would need to know that I'm lactose intolerant, so that limits this to just pranking my sibling-in-laws.