Zoo Hybrids

 

I feel like I've done a similar comic before... Oh, my GMO animals comic is similar. And I just had to fact check myself because that one mentions squirrel monkeys and I have no recollection of those critters and thought I might have meant spider monkeys. Have no fear - both types of monkeys exist. 

We saw spider monkeys at the Beardsley Zoo - check it out if you're in the CT area. It's a nice little zoo. 

Text:
Sign: Welcome to the ZOO!
M: Next up are the spider monkeys.
L: Thankfully not a hybrid of those two creatures.

Parent Hood Haikus

Double Feature! 

Happy early Birthday to my brother!
Some days it be like that. Some kids know when you're on your last nerve and try to hop right on it. Other kids are completely oblivious as they trip over your last nerve. Does my household have both types? I will neither confirm nor deny. 

Sometimes I comic my thoughts - sometimes I haiku my thoughts - sometimes I do both. 

Text:
Parenthood Haiku:
Don't test me, my child.
I get text anxiety.
I know I will fail.

Parent Hood Haiku:
Rob the rich to feed
My kids one snack of berries,
Then do it again.

Woodchuck's Cousin

 

A comic in three parts. 

It's autumn, so there are chubby woodchucks about. Or do you call them groundhogs? Whistlepigs? I haven't heard that last one before doing a search for other names of woodchucks. And yes, this is a comic inspired by my brother-in-law telling me to make a comic about this.

Text:
M: You should do a comic about a woodchuck upchucking wood.
L: *thinking*
Option 1:
U: Oh, no - you're looking for a woodchuck to remove those logs. I am an upchuck, and you don't want what I can do.
R: *horrified*
Option 2:
W: I am a woodchuck. But, due to my frequent nausea, they call me an upchuck.
R: *horrified*

Color Me Surprised

Bonus:

 

Happy Birthday to my Grandpa! He's the best. 
Thanks for helping, kiddos. What even is the origin of this saying? It might have to do with blushing. No paint, markers, or crayons needed. 

Text:
M: Well then, color me surprised.
L: Ok, where are the crayons.
Bonus:
R: I have finger paint!
O: Markers!

The Imagination of Children

 

My kids both have very active imaginations and therefore it's free entertainment for me to sip my tea and just watch whatever their getting into next. Any piece of paper can be a map, menu, or whatever is needed for the given scenario. Any toy can become the long lost treasure of an intrepid group of adventurers. It's just amazing to see these kids growing up into the next level of childhood. 

Text:
Title: The Imagination of Children
O: I NEED TO GO!!!
R: Where?
L: ?
O: To South America! To find blue unicorns.

Toddler Art Critic

 

The art in question, literally: 

My little artist is particular about his art being recognized for what it is. I think I did a rather good comic recreation of his artwork. He works with explosions of color and loads of joy, so you can't argue against that. I keep telling his older sister (who insists "he is just scribbling!") that you have to enjoy something before you get skilled in it. Don't diminish the first forays as amateur when that should be a badge of honor (doing something for the love of it rather than for payment). 

Text:

L: *Looking at artfully scribbled page* Is this... a chompadoo? That chomps things?
O: *exasperated* No, Mom, this is a chopadoo. It chops things!

Mommy, no, MomAI

 

Don't use AI or you could be next? Not that I use AI very much as a mom. Usually just to convert recipes to use the pan size I have, or find substitutions for ingredients I don't feel like taking a specific trip to the grocery store to procure. Also, now I'm thinking of the song "If I Were a Rich Man" from Fiddler on the Roof but it's now "If I Were an AI" and it's about drinking tons of water and having the quickest but not always correctest answer. 

Explanation: My name is Lauren. It didn't look right to do LAIren as it just looks like I'm shouting the start of my name. And Lairen just looks like a misspelling. 

Text:
M: AI is replacing everything!!!
L: Mom is now AI. LaurAIn.
Kids: *shocked*

Rocky Cartoons

 

Rocky and Bullwinkle is a favorite cartoon from my husband's childhood, however my children haven't seen much of it as there are perilous parts and my daughter doesn't handle those well. Rocky is apparently a dog in the Paw Patrol show (we don't watch it but my kids like the books from the library). I'm now remembering when my daughter heard "We Don't Talk About Bruno" and immediately thought of Cinderella's dog. Kids don't handle duplicate names well, and honestly most adults don't either but sometimes we don't make the connections like kids do.

Text:
Title: Cartoons
M: Is that a flying squirrel on your shirt? Like Rocky?
R: Dad, Rocky is a puppy. 

Chocolate Blueberry Pumpernickel

 

In an amazing turn of events, he like the pumpernickel! I did inform him clearly of the total lack of both blueberry and chocolate, and apparently I got through to him. 

Blog update: I am struggling to get pictures to upload, but if I inspect the page and show the console then the picture upload works? I'm not sure what's going on, but I did find a path forward so the blog can continue until whatever's broken gets sorted out. It seems an error is being thrown but if I'm looking for the error, it doesn't happen. Yay software. But I can see how this bug could get into prod since most devs have the console open to catch what's going on and therefore wouldn't see this. 

Text:
O: I want a chocolate blueberry bagel!
L: That's pumpernickel.
O: Ok, I want that.
L: Sure, let's see how this goes. 

Mobile Bad Decisions

 

I was out and about and saw this van advertising itself as a Mobile Tattoo lab. In my mind, they do the tattoos while driving about and that seems like a terrible idea. In reality, they probably park at a location like a food truck does but instead of getting a tasty treat you get painful and rather permanent artwork. I don't have tattoos so I wouldn't know why someone would be drawn to this (haha, pun). I just did a search on "mobile tattoo labs" to see if I could find the one I saw, but I'm only seeing tattoo buses and fancy mobile setups - the one I saw was like a white utility van with advertisements on all sides. It had a definite sketch factor but haha, that's a pun too.

Text:
M: That van is a mobile tattoo lab?!
L: They bring the bad decisions to you. 

Running Club

 

Happy Birthday to my Mom!
Tale as old as time. So that's how the Running Club gets more members. Here I was thinking people actually set out to join it, but it's all looking different now. The just ask you to take their photo, then say you don't have to join to take the photo, then amend to say you can join when you take the photo, then amend to say you can not take the photo and still join the club, then they keep amending as you walk into the gym to escape their pleas.

Text:
M: How was the gym this monring?
L: The Running Club asked me to take their picture then tried to recruit me.
M: That's how they get you. 

Wisdom of a Child

 

Nobody wants you to have the wisdom of a child. Faith of a child, sure. Wonder of a child, excellent. But that wonder and faith needs to be tempered by a caretaker with the wisdom of age. 

Text:
M: That's not a wise move!
R: When has that literally ever stopped us?
O: *Poking something he should not* 

Diavola

 

Surely I wasn't the only one that thought this. 

Explanation: Connections is an online puzzle game which gives you 16 tiles and you have to make 4 groups of 4 similar items. The day in question had "diavola" as one of the tiles (it's a spicy pizza) and I had to look it up but totally read it as diablo mixed with viola. Then that made me think of the song "The Devil Went Down to Georgia" which mentions a fiddle showdown. I don't really know the song but I had a friend recommend it for a roller coaster ride in Florida that let you pick a song to listen to while getting launched through the coaster (it might have been Hollywood Rip Ride Rockit but I totally thought it was Disney not Universal but we went to both parks during that trip so I get them confused).

Text:
A: Did you get the Connections puzzle today?
L: Yep.
A: Did you think "diavola" was an instrument that Satan plays?
L: 🎜The devil went down to Georgia... and picked up his viola. His diaviola.🎝

Most Wonderful Time (Repost)

 

So I have posted this one before but it's the perfect comic for September 1st. I did have to search a bit to find it because I had totally forgotten what I had called it. MostWonderfulTime? Wonderful? Time? Fall? Apple? Holiday? Nope, it was saved as "autumn" and yes "was" saved as that because I changed it to one of the first guesses I took at what it should be called. 

Text:
L: It's the MOST WONDERFUL TIIIIIIIME of the yeeeaaar!!! *holding maple leaf and apple cider*
Signs: Big E, Corn Maize, RennFest

Bug Workout

 

True Story, except it was like so: we walked across a park and when we came to a stop, a bug landed on my leg and I had to spaz a little bit to dislodge it and then my watch buzzed to say "you tracked a workout!" but it was referring to our little hike across the park, not the bug spaz. But I think the bug spaz should have counted as a HIIT session. 

Text:
M: I see you tracked a workout earlier today.
L: Yeah, a bug landed on my leg and would not get off.

Hand Biting Proverb

 

Someday, my children will see the wisdom of my words... as I'm just quoting proverbs from other wiser people. 

Explanation: "Don't bite the hand that feeds you" is a proverb meaning don't hurt the one that is giving you what you need, as that could discourage them from continuing to give you what you need. But self-harm is not usually what comes to mind with this proverb (unless you have a toddler, an uncoordinated one).

Text:
O: I bit my finger!!! *crying*
L: Buddy, don't bite the hand that feeds you.

Minute Hours

 

I am yet again reminded that children are a blank slate when it comes to knowledge, and have to be taught concepts of time and such. I am fairly certain that my kids currently don't know how many minutes are in an hour, and therefore don't know that half an hour is 30 minutes. They are learning the concept of minutes from watching videos, like a Bluey episode is 8 minutes and a Danny Go song is about 4 minutes. And sometimes they get the whole "tomorrow we are doing something" but it seems everything in the past is "yesterday." Time is confusing anyways - I get why kids don't get it.

Text:
L: How far away did Dad say the hotel was, half an hour?
R: He said 35 hours.
L: Minutes, girl. 35 minutes. 

Dispense with the Water and Pleasantries

 

Dispense those pleasantries. So I thought this was just a common phrase, but upon a quick Google search it seems to be a quote from Star Wars? 

Jerjerrod: Lord Vader, this is an unexpected pleasure. We're honored by your presence.

Vader: You may dispense with the pleasantries, commander. I'm here to put you back on schedule.

—Return of the Jedi

So I learned something new today. 

Explanation: Water often comes from a dispenser, which means water can be dispensed. Darth Vader's quote about pleasantries references dispensing with them. I combined the two. 

Text:
L: Your water, much like the pleasantries, has been dispensed.
M: ?

All the Milk Cows

 

This is another throwback comic, from when Robin was a bit younger and didn't understand the rhyming part of the goodbye pairings. It should be "See you later, alligator! Take a bow, milk cow! Out the door, dinosaur! Wave goodbye, butterfly!" and so on. There's a whole song about them. But it still is cute how kids process things. 

Text:
R: See you later, milk cow! Take a bow, milk cow! Out the door, milk cow! Wave goodbye, milk cow!
L: The alligator, dinosaur, and butterfly feel left out, my girl. 

Yesterday's Pets

Pet stores are like the free zoo for kiddos. There was a pet store (Today's Pets) in a shopping strip near me where we would browse before getting groceries. It is now a sushi place and I just think that's ironic, since the pet store had a long wall covered in fish tanks. I wonder if they were able to repurpose any of the things from the previous occupants. I have not visited despite my curiosity and my desire to eat sushi. 

Text:
R: Can we go to the pet store?
L: That's not a pet store anymore. It's now ... oh, it's a sushi place. Hmmm.
Store sign: Today's Pets Kawa Sushi AYCE

No Snuggles Allowed

 

The mind of a child makes all sorts of connections that take me a minute to follow. Now that I think about it, my kids might think all sailors are pirates. We were watching Turning Pointe Ballet's Little Mermaid on YouTube, and my kids were calling Prince Eric's ship's captain the Pirate Captain. No amount of saying they are all sailors and that's just the captain could get them to realize that they were not pirates. 

Explanation: my kid hears "dictatorship" and thinks it's a type of boat (ship), and apparently only pirates are on boats. 

Text:
O: No snuggles allowed!
L: What kind of dictatorship is this?!?
O: ... We don't have a ship. We are not pirates. 

Counting

 

So in French, they count oddly. I don't know French, but I do know this. Actually I just looked it up (here) and they don't have specific numbers for 70 (“sixty-ten”), 80 (“four-twenties”), and 90 (“four-twenties-ten”)? So that's unique. But they do have a number for 30 (trente) however I think my comic's point still stands. Also this is an older comic that I took a while to draw - my kiddo knows how to count at least to one hundred so this is a throwback. 

Text:
L: 27, 28, 29 - what comes next?
R: Twenty-ten!
L: We are not French.

Rules of Parenthood Continued

 

You really start to understand lawyers when you're a parent and your kids are so very literal. I have had to refrain from snapping at my child when I realized he was technically doing what I said, just not in the way that I intended (the mind of a child is a bizarre place that does not understand figures of speech). The interaction that sparked this particular comic was my toddler trying to clean the sink with his toothbrush. When I told him not to use his toothbrush to clean the bathroom, he might have eyed his sister's toothbrush. But now that I think of it, my rule as listed in this comic does not prevent someone (Ori) from using someone else's (Robin's) toothbrush for bathroom cleaning. 

Text:
A: What new rules have arisen in your household this week?
L: We only brush our own teeth with our own toothbrush. 

Tootsie Rolls

 

The mind of a toddler is a wonderful place, full of new experiences and unfamiliar language idioms. 

Explanation: Would "tootsies" be toes, or toots (farts)? Neither is a good option. My kiddo calls toes "toesies" as in "I didn't want my toesies to touch the cold floor" and I think it's adorable. 

Text:
O: What is this?
L: A Tootsie Roll.
O: What is it's flavor?
M: Tootsies. 

Taco Dinner

 

Parenthood is a wild ride. Also, it's all about rebranding. Oh, you don't like chili? Well no worries, we are just having meaty beans. (credit to my friends Jen and Eric for that one) My little guy used to say he didn't like whatever was offered, no matter what it was or how much he actually liked it. He now accepts/requests items and then eats one bite, says it's good, and goes no further. 

Text:
L: We're having tacos for dinner.
O: I don't like tacos!
L: I'll give you a brand new bouncy house if you can tell me what a taco is.
O: ... a tickle ball?
L: Don't complain about food you actually like. 

Rules of Parenthood

 

So true. So many oddly specific rules.

Text:
A: Is parenthood like you expected?
L: I expected to say "don't put your finger up your nose." I actually say "don't put your brother's toes up your nose." I then clarify "don't put your or other's toe(s) up your or other's nose."

Unexpected Red Rover

 

Happy 17 years to my husband! 💕
I don't recall the name the song as it was on a service-generated playlist, but I have not forgotten the song. Also thinking of "running into <someone's> arms" as Red Rover is quite context-changing. 

Explanation: Red Rover was a (terrible) game from my childhood where one team would link hands and call over a player from the other team, who would run at you full force and try to break through the line. 

Text:
Song: Come on and run into my arms
L: That's called clotheslining.
M: Unexpected Red Rover.

Means a Latte

 

True Story, the gas price fluctuated 50¢ between my last two fill-ups. Granted, the cheaper price was at a Buc-ee's so bulk discount and all that. But still, $5 is a latte. 

Explanation: "lot" and "latte" sound similar. $5 is an average price for a coffee (I assume, as I am a tea drinker). 

Text:
A: Why did you go to that gas station?
B: When getting ten gallons, it's $5 cheaper there. That might not seem like much, but it's actually a latte. *holding coffee*

Fat Singing Cows

 

Apparently "till the cows come home" is a phrase that means it'll take all day, while "till the fat lady sings" is a phrase that means the end of something. It alludes to an opera which ended with a powerful soprano number that required a well-built, large woman to sing it, hence it was over once the fat lady sang. So all that to say I think we both used these phrases correctly? 

Text:
M: When do the cows come home?
L: I think it's when the fat lady sings. 

Introversion from the Mouth of Babes

So we had a visiting family a few weeks ago at our church, and they had a kid around my youngest's age, and my kiddo did not extend the right hand of fellowship. He actually burst into tears when he saw a new kid in nursery and his buddy wasn't there. He did rally himself and parallel play with her there, but there was no friendship started that day. 

Text:
L: Did you meet a new friend in church nursery today?

O: No.

L: ...was there a new kid today?

O: Yes. :(

L: Oh, my little introvert.

O: *sobbing* NO MANNETTE!
L: I know, Buddy, Ma-Annette wasn't there today.

Special Mayo

 

I didn't know that my kid knew our pastor's name, since she usually refers to him as "Nathanael's dad" which is fair since she knows her friends more than their parents. Honestly, I never considered that the phrases "Pastor Cho" and "Trader Joe" have a similar cadence. (Her grandma has alpha-gal and the only mayo she knows is truly vegan is the TJ one.) The super confusing thing is that we had just had a church fellowship where the Chos brought a salad which contained mayo so I did have to think... but I realized what was going on before calling the Chos and asking for their mayo brand. 

Text:
R: You need to get Pastor Cho's mayo for the potato salad - it's the only one Grandma can have.
L: ... Trader Joe's mayo?
R: yes. 

Mr. Shark Time

 

So many variations of this game exist. I've heard it called Mr. Wolf or Mr. Fox as well. The name of the game is "What's the time, Mr. <insert animal>?" and play is simple (it shows up in at least one Bluey episode, "Shadowlands" and a Danny Go episode about Summer Time). One player has their back turned to everyone, everyone asks the question, the player gives a time, and everyone takes that many steps towards the player. At some point, the player answers "Dinner time!" and then it becomes a game of tag. 

Explanation: 24hr time is like 12hr time except it keeps counting up after noon, instead of resetting at one. Therefore twenty o'clock would be (20-12) 8pm. 

Text:
R: What time is it, Mr. Shark?
O: Twenty o'clock!
L: That's known as 8pm by many. 

Spring Disney

 

You never know when a Disney character could spring into a conversation. I have no clue how a spring Pluto feels, but probably happy? Pluto is a pretty happy character. As long as chipmunks aren't hiding in the Christmas tree.

Explanation: Daisy, Donald, and Pluto are all classic Disney characters. 

Text:
M: That was refreshing.
L: Are you feeling like a spring daisy? Or a spring Donald?
M: More like a spring Pluto.

Car Colors

There are so many shades of red with cars. I didn't have a way to work in Patriot Red (Mitsubishi) or Colorado Red (Jeep), but maybe someday.... 

Explanation: In the game DOTA2, the teams are called Radiant and Dire. Also there's something called  Ultra Kill (four kills in a short time window). 

Text:
Title: DOTA2: A Day in the Life - Dragon Knight
L: My Honda is Radiant Red.
DK: Not Dire Red?!
L: ... Tesla has ULTRA RED. 

Migraine Not Cure

 

Please do not attempt. So at my gym, there used to be two hot tubs but they changed one to be a cold plunge which is something I intend to do never. The tubs are next to each other and I had this idea. Ice and heat are recommended to alleviate migraines, but what part of your body gets which temperature? Everyone has an opinion about it. 

Text:
A: Did you know if you put your hands in the hot tub and feet in the cold plunge, you will either cure your migraine OR get kicked out of the gym?
B: ... what?
A: Yeah, the second option is way more likely. 

Sale Sale Sale

 

What do they call this where you're from? I kinda want to go to one and get a landscape painting for cheap and then paint a dinosaur into the picture and proudly hang it somewhere. 

Explanation: When you sell your old stuff on your property, it could be called a yard sale or a rummage sale or a garage sale. Possibly other names for it exist - please let me know if you know of any. 

Text:
M: There's a yard sale a few streets down from us.
L: Shall we go rummage about in someone's garage? 

Erranding

 

Some errands can be made in whatever vehicle is available. Others are not that flexible. I mean, I could make it work - but I've gone this long without filling a gas can and I'm not feeling the need to break my streak. And that just seems overly complicated when I can just take my car to the gas station. 

Text:
M: You can take my car for errands when I WFH (work from home), if you want to get used to how it drives.
L: Well, one of my errands is to get petrol in my car.
M: Ah, that would be difficult to do in my car. 

Overcooked Kitchen

 

So my spouse and I just finished playing Overcooked 2 and it was a journey. It was rather frustrating at times but overall very fun to play. You do need to be on the same wavelength and cooperate smoothly to get through it all. And there are a lot of bonus levels! The graphics are cute and the music is nice.

Explanation: in the game "Overcooked 2" (and also the original "Overcooked!"), you are set in a kitchen and have a bunch of orders to cook and fulfill. However, the kitchen is working against you in your endeavors. It's not how you would want a kitchen to be. But you do have specific tools on any given level, like a rotisserie cooker or massive wok, to cook the ingredients so you can assemble the final product. There are many points of failure, which do complicate things. 

Text:
M: We could get a rotisserie cooker for our kitchen.
L: And then! Sliding counters that move on an unknown timer! Conveyer belts that end in a trash can! Cutting boards totally unreachable from where you get ingredients!
M: No more "Overcooked!" for you!

Throwback Fourth

 Some patriotic ones from the archives:

Scrunchies

 

Bonus!

There is much to be said about 90's fashion. Much of it doesn't need to be said. HOWEVER my daughter has started using a scrunchie in her hair when she goes to bed and WOW her hair is so much tamer in the mornings. 

Text:
M: I have been told this is a scrunchie. They were very popular when your mom was a kid.
L: Had to hold back that perm somehow. 

Bonus:
L: Feels nicer than a banana clip.
M: How do those work?
L: I never learned.