Introversion from the Mouth of Babes

So we had a visiting family a few weeks ago at our church, and they had a kid around my youngest's age, and my kiddo did not extend the right hand of fellowship. He actually burst into tears when he saw a new kid in nursery and his buddy wasn't there. He did rally himself and parallel play with her there, but there was no friendship started that day. 

Text:
L: Did you meet a new friend in church nursery today?

O: No.

L: ...was there a new kid today?

O: Yes. :(

L: Oh, my little introvert.

O: *sobbing* NO MANNETTE!
L: I know, Buddy, Ma-Annette wasn't there today.

Trinity Question

 

So we listen to the catechisms sung on "Ask Me Whoooo" which is an excellent set of albums available on Spotify, YoutTubeMusic, and other places surely, including in disc form. My youngest only knows the first few, and is hindering himself in learning more. 

Text:
Music: In how many persons does this one God exist? In three Persons.
O: I don't know this one (spoken over the answer portion)
L: Buddy.

What Else Did God Make

We have been teaching our kids the First Catechisms (there's 150 in there and while I disagree with 133/134, the rest are sound theology and also we have only tackled the first like 10). There are songs to go along with them - Ask Me Whooo. I've only heard the first two albums (available on Spotify and YouTubeMusic) so like the first 100 catechisms set to song and they are a catchy way to learn some sound theology. Provided your kid actually sings along instead of making his own version and overpowering the chorus. Yes, God did indeed make the trees and flowers but ALSO so much more - all things, to be exact.

Links here:
First Catechism: https://opc.org/cce/FirstCatechism.html 

Ask Me Whooo: http://askmewhooo.com/home.html

Text:
Song and Mom: What else did God make? Whaaat else did God make?
Song and daughter: God made all things, all things, all things! God made all things, aaaaaall thiiiiings.
Son over song: Trees and flowers!

Furniture Princess

 

There is a wooden bench in our church atrium and it's a solid, smooth bench however the legs are not even so it wobbles. It has no upholstery so it's not dated, but it is loud since the center legs are longer than the ones on either side. It's not an ideal situation, and yet it stays.

Explanation: The princess is Belle from Beauty and the Beast, a movie where the staff of a castle are turned into furniture and other objects in said castle. There's other plot points but that's the relevant one for this comic. 

Text:
D: Did we get rid of that old bench from the church lobby?
M: Nope, someone is sentimentally attached to it.
D: Nooooo, who has sentimental attachment to furniture?!?!
Belle: :( 

Veggie Tales Father Abraham

Happy Father's Day! Especially to my Dad, who is the best dad. And to my husband, who is the best dad to our kiddos! 

For those who don't know, VeggieTales is a cartoon featuring fruits and veggies (Larry the Cucumber, Pa Grape, etc.) and they don't have arms or legs - they just hop around and if they need to hold something it just floats. Also for those who don't know, the song "Father Abraham" is a wiggle-releaser sung in children's ministries and involves moving your arms and legs. And thirdly, I have a Sunday School playlist for my kids on Spotify and there is a version of "Father Abraham" sung by the Veggie Tales characters and it confuses me. 

Text:
L: That makes about as much sense as the VeggieTales singing "Father Abraham."
A: *confused squint*

Toddler Songs: Church Edition

 

So yeah this happened. I aim to keep my kids with me through the hymn section of the service and put them in the nursery before the sermon begins, but my toddler has been wanting to skip the 11am service altogether and just do nursery for the whole time. She really likes the toys and workers. My baby, on the other hand, wants to be with me the whole time and has been crying when I drop him off in nursery. But the workers say he's been warming up to them and he does like the toys so who knows - maybe both will be clamoring for nursery before I know it. 

Text:
Title: At Church
L: ♫ Amazing love - How can it be 🎝
R: ♫ Nursery - wanna go to nursery 🎝

Hymn Singing

 

I thought of this during a music service and now I think of it nearly every time the music leader uses this phraseology when explaining when we are singing the chorus. So clearly he's meaning sing verses one, two, then the chorus, then verse three etc. But the phrase could be taken to mean either singing verses one and two at the same time (would be the same tune but conflicting words) or we only need to stay together for the first two verses (would be discordant afterwards as everyone does what seems the right pace in their own eyes). 

Text:
Title: Hymn with four verses
P: Sing verses one and two together.
S: Like, at the same time?
L: Do we all go our own pace on the other verses?
Postscript: He meant skip the chorus between those verses.

Greatest Grace

Happy Easter! He is risen indeed. I hope you are able to take time today to focus on the gift of Jesus' resurrection, and what that means for you individually.  If you want to learn more, click any of those links in the previous sentence!

Text:
A: How did you pick the name for your church?
B: "Grace" and "Greater Grace" were already in use.
Sign: "Greatest Grace Church"

Trichotomist vs Triceratops

 

I think this is the last one in this unnamed series about tri-di-mono-things (haven't come up with a witty name for it) but saved the best for last because dinosaurs! I thought I had a joke about triceratops from my dinosaur egg oatmeal packets but I was thinking of the stegosaurus one - 

Q: What does a stegosaurus do at night?
A: Stego-snores!!!

Oh wait, I remember the triceratops one -

Q: What does a triceratops wear for pants?
A: Tricera-bottoms!!!

So many great jokes from the best oatmeal out there (the sugar eggs that melt to show dinosaur-shaped sprinkles are just top of the line). If you're wondering about trichotomy, look at the previous comic (I would link but it's still a scheduled post so it's being weird). If you're wondering about the etymology of triceratops, look at this comic from earlier.

Text:
Apatosaurus: Are you a trichotomist?
Triceratops: No, a triceratops. 

Tri vs Di with Falsehood

 

So in a previous comic I mentioned we'd get to tri- vs di-chotomy in a later comic but then I misplaced said comics but I found them! So here's one and there'll be another after this.
Theological trichotomy is the belief that humans are made up of three parts and I gotta look up what those are - it's body, soul, and spirit. But trichotomy in general is just an item/concept made up of three parts. Theological dichotomy says humans just have body and soul, i.e. material and immaterial. (You should be able to figure out what a dichotomy is from these examples but to be clear it's just an item/concept made up of two parts). I won't post links because it's a raging theological debate and I think it's fretting over something that's not fundamental (and also seems a little pedantic). I don't stand in either camp - I know we definitely have material and immaterial components but I don't think debate over how many of which parts we have is helpful. 
False dichotomy however is the belief (in any sphere, not just theological) that there are only two choices when in fact there are more than that available. It's like saying I have to wear a red or a blue shirt today when in fact I have a whole wardrobe to choose from (that's an over simplification but I think it holds true).
In superhero movies, they tend to buy into false monochotomies which is when they say "It's the only way!" when in fact there are several ways. But it's a classic trope that won't be ending any time soon I'm thinking. 

Text: 
A: Are you a trichotomist?
B: No, I'm more of a false dichotomist. 

Casserole Pans

This one was inspired by a church fellowship in the time of Covid when we were wondering how our church would handle dishing (haha) out the food - turns out they asked for volunteers to serve the food out so they were the only ones to touch the handles (I think that's how some buffets have handled it as well). It was a tasty fellowship - for those outside of Baptist circles, 'fellowship' means a church gathering centered around a meal. Sometimes the food is supplied by the church, sometimes it's a potluck and everyone brings something to share. The potlucks work best when there's a theme and people sign up or are designated what to bring so we don't end up with 15 green salads and three of the same sandwiches. My previous church would use the last names and say A-H brings sandwiches and I-P brings salads and R-Z brings desserts and singles bring drinks or chips. 

Text:
M: How will they serve the casseroles?
L: Let's see how it pans out.

Robin vs Cardinal

 

Now that I've looked up the Catholic Church hierarchy for the last comic, I realize the cardinals are rather high on said organization chart. So the robin is aiming high, which is usually good, but not very realistic depending on how literal the forest church is about their cardinals. Birds of a feather flock together, so I'm not sure he can fly with that crowd... 

Text:
Robin: I want to rise through the ranks of the Catholic Church!
Cardinal: Robby, you will never be a cardinal.

Forest Church

 

It must be an important church if it has a cardinal! I don't actually know how the Catholic church hierarchy works (I'm not Catholic) but I'm pretty sure each church doesn't get a cardinal. But if your church is in the forest, who knows how many cardinals you would have. Now I'm thinking about the Three Musketeers - I'm pretty sure there was a cardinal involved. Yep, Cardinal Richelieu. 

Text:
Blue Jay: How goes the forest church?
Cardinal: So many deer saints.

Moving the Door

There was a lot of text for this one, so I opted to type using my custom font which I like.
So the restroom configuration could be improved at my church, but it would require moving the door which is not the end of the world but would be a decent construction project. And I was thinking how it could go wrong and came up with this comic. I don't believe the project has gotten past the 'should we do this' phase, so it's nowhere close to happening. The restroom works as is, so there's no rush, and if there's no rush, it's not gonna happen. At least that's how it seems to work normally.

Test:
A: Why are the ladies mad at us? We are moving the restroom door, just like they requested.
B: I have no idea - we patched over the old doorway last week and we plan to install the new doorway in the coming weeks.

<Explanation - if you patch over the door and haven't cut in the new doorway, the room is inaccessible>

Wearing Multiple Hats

I thought this one up during a meeting as well. You know there are so many kinds of hats out there, but it's hard to think of ones to draw when you need to make a stack of them. Yes, he's holding the Fantasia hat and a fez.

Text:
B: You are so good at wearing hats - here are two more for you!

Bird Sanctuary

I realized after writing that I didn't specify - the location is a church sanctuary, not a bird sanctuary. This comic is inspired by a true story - our church had on two occasions a bird intruder. I believe the one that was on a Sunday morning was able to be safely removed. The other one got in somehow without anyone noticing so the first people on a Wednesday walked in to see what looked like white paint splattered all over the lobby and then there was a search for the bird body... So after these events I considered doing the above but didn't. Didn't want to stress out people.

Text:
L: There's a bird in the sanctuary!
S: No, not again!
*L shows S a plastic pink flamingo*

Church Carpet Committee

This is a play on the fairies from Sleeping Beauty. And it seems like every Baptist church has either red or blue carpet.

Hippo Critters

Sadly true...

AC Is Cold

Bonus Monday comic! Might be based on church yesterday.
Here's why I need to ice my toe: Broken Toe Saga

Icing the Singer

For those who are not NFL-inclined, there's a thing called 'icing the kicker' and that's where this is going.