Potato Chips

My husband came up with this one. We normally stop by the local grocery store to get potato chips when we leave the Sunday evening service and go to my in-laws (way back when we had in-person services, so up until March). We normally get the ones on sale that have good ingredients (i.e. few ingredients). I like potatoes.
How are we at the end of May? It seems likes it's been forever since I've traveled. The last place I went was up to CT for Christmas/New Years. That's just crazy that Mark and I have not left the state... this year. Wait, we might have gone down to D.C. Possibly. But that's a short car/metro ride. Now that I think about it, I don't recall the Metro which means the venue was most likely in Baltimore which is state-side. Haha, that's not the right word. But I don't think we've left the state since December. I want to travel again. But I want everyone to be healthy.
What's coming up next month? Stay tuned. :)

Text:
Pope: Are you a layperson?
Dude: No, I'm more of an Utz person.

Home Project Permits

This is a partially true story because while my half is true, Mark did not deny permission and agreed that opening a can of paint that has sat for a decade in the basement is a frustrating task. He is amazing and understanding and I like him alotalot. We are prepping our house for staging and fixing all the nail holes and moving excess furniture and sometimes you just don't want to deal anymore but over all it is kinda exciting and also we have stuff we haven't used in a decade and can just give away now. But not the cake topper from our wedding. That is staying with us for the long run.

Text:
Title: Me doing home projects
L: Permission to be a whiny quitter?
M: Permission denied.

Peak Productivity

I thought this one up after a particularly loud sneeze. I had not taken any expectorants, so all was well. But that would truly be peak productivity. And now that's what I'll think of whenever someone talks about peak productivity. And now maybe you will too!

Text:
A: How would you define peak productivity?
B: This one time, I took Mucinex (R) and then sneezed.

Contact-Less Society

Hahaha but seriously, I was putting off going to my optometrist to get my eyes checked and get new contacts and then the Pandemic hit and everything's closed and I am in my last box of contacts and I've just been wearing my glasses most days because I don't care and since I'm staying home, i.e. not wearing a mask, glasses are just easier and I can take them off when I take a nap.
I saw a tip about how to stop your glasses from fogging when you're wearing a mask - make sure the part around the nose is tight so your exhaled air goes down instead of up. Also, you can wash your glasses in the sink with soap and water! I did not know this. They are so sparkly now. Well, they were. They were nice and sparkly for a few hours then they went the way of all glasses and somehow smears started appearing.

Text:
M: Why are so many people in here wearing glasses?
L: We've become a contact-less society!

Resource Hog

I thought this one up a while ago, pretty sure it was related to a work issue. Probably was searching through logs to find the culprit. I'm not a fan of hunting in real life - I'm fine with others doing it but if I had to kill my own meat, I would probably be vegetarian. I remember as a kid, we had a neighbor who was a hunter and this one time I saw a deer "hanging out" behind his house and I was like IT'S BAMBI'S MOM.

Text:
Hunter: What are you nerds tracking?
Nerd 1: A resource hog.
Nerd 2: Should be huge!

Baby Shower

A friend or possibly a friend of a friend mentioned going to a "Pistols or Pearls" party and I was confused until I saw the pictures and it was clearly a baby shower. I just think overly gendered stereotypes are not helpful, so I put a different spin on this one. Who knows what my sister will do for her kiddo - I have a gift ready though! That's one benefit to being home all the weekends - plenty of crochet time (but running low on a few colors of yarn, and I can't go out and get more, but I can order online, but color picking is hard digitally).
Also realized I had a typo, but I caught it before posting so that's good! That is a definite benefit to drawing digitally - I can just open the file and edit rather than needing to fix, scan, crop, etc.

Text:
Banner: Pistols or Pearls??
Guest 1: I'm rooting for a marine biologist over a weapons expert.
Guest 2: *confused/concerned*

Lumiere

Happy Birthday to my grandma! I have many happy memories of staying the weekend at her house, watching movies and doing crafts and attending Awana at her church (my church didn't have that program) and coloring pictures through choir practice while she played the piano. I'm very grateful for the early exposure to arts and music that I got through my family! Having hobbies is great, especially when there are limits on where you can go and what you can do - I have yarn to crochet and pictures to paint and a violin to play (I should do that last one, I haven't in a while - the weather is nice so I can play with windows open and share with the neighbors).

In the song that the castle inhabitants sing to Belle, Lumiere sings "Be our guest, be our guest, put our service to the test", and this comic is imagining someone actually doing that. 

Text:
Lumiere (candlestick from Disney's Beauty and the Beast) : Dude, you are putting my service to the test.

Security Question 2

Another one! Very similar to the last, but a little different. And also to highlight the amazingly odd bird, the emu. It is flightless while also being about the size of a full grown human, so you can't be too hard on them because we can't fly either and also a 120lb flying bird would be quite frankly terrifying (well, per wiki they range from 40-132 pounds which is quite a range but the upper end is more than me so there's that). Well now I'm curious - the largest extant flying bird weighs about 20 pounds per wiki so we're good.

Text:
Prompt 1: Please save a response for additional security. Answers are not case-sensitive. What is your favorite { animal, bird, color, dog breed } ? <Enter response>
Selection: bird
Answer: emu (underlined in red)
Error text: Answers must be at least 6 characters long and include a number and a special character.

Security Question 1

Did I just have to reset an account and get rather irritated at the protocols? Maybe. Do I think these questions are a good idea? Yes, when used properly, but sometimes they give too specific or too vague questions and I'm thinking either everyone will know that or there's no way I'll remember what I put for that. I like the free-form ones where you can save the question and answer because then I can put things like favorite coffee mug and answers like I DON'T DRINK COFFEE and who's gonna guess that? Well, I shouldn't use that one.

Text:
Prompt 1: Please save a response for additional security. Answers are not case-sensitive. What is your favorite { animal, bird, color, dog breed } ? <Enter response>
Selection: animal
Answer: dog (underlined in red)
Error text: Please enter upper, lower, and numeric characters as part of your response.

Baseball Confusion

Happy belated Birthday to my brother-in-law! He's several time zones to the east so that means... it's definitely after his birthday.
I had this comic in the works for a while but I had just written down 'bat who plays baseball' and I could not remember the thought that caused that or why I had written it down so briefly. I had to look up what rye looks like, as that's not a normal thing I encounter. Also, I forgot to draw who's up to bat. It's a very skeletal crew. Haha, I should incorporate that somehow but drawing a stick figure skeleton does not sound simple.

Text:
Announcer 1: The bat is pitching, the rye is catching, and the pitcher is on 2nd.
Announcer 2: This game is so confusing.
*Bat (animal) is pitching, a stalk of rye is catching, and a pitcher of Kool-aid is on 2nd*

Gender-Neutral Mail

We have a femaleman :) A mailwoman. A female postal worker who delivers our mail and this one time she came to our door because a letter was 23 cents short on postage so I gave her a quarter so I could get my letter. It was an invitation to a baby shower the previous week.
I appreciate all the effort that goes into the global mail system - it's pretty amazing that I can put a letter in my local mailbox with an international stamp on it and somehow it arrives at my sister-in-law's flat in Hong Kong. I don't know how it works but I'm glad it does.

Text:
M: Mailman!
F: I am a lady.
M: Oh, sorry, Femaleman!

Dyeing Art

I came up with this one a while ago but now I have time to go through a lot of my backlog since I'm not getting too much new material since I'm not interacting with people. But I did just think up a comic after reading my Bible yesterday, we were in Luke 15 and you'll see that comic when I get around to writing it :)
I like yarn, but I do not normally buy the hand-dyed kind because it's more expensive and I have so much of my own yarn that I should be using up but sometimes there's yarn ON SALE and it's super soft and pretty and I get more. But I have a three-bin shelf and it all fits in there, as a limiter. Well, except the super chunky yarn that's next to it. But it's in a basket so it's all good.

C: Wow, you're the only person I know that colors their own yarn!
Y: Yeah, it's a dyeing art.

Binary Fairy

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaappy Birthday to my amazing husband! You make my life more magical every day <3 As annoying as this quarantine/lockdown/stay home order thing is, I'm glad I'm stuck with you :)
I think I came up with the idea of the binary fairy in college, as a way to explain why sometimes the code wasn't working, you don't change anything but you rerun the test, and it then is working. Rather than being alarmed by the non-stability of the code base, just put your trust in the pixel dust!

Text:
M: This didn't work last time I ran this test but now it works - how???
F: The binary fairy. Sprinkling her pixel dust over the code base.