Tuesday, November 24, 2020

Thanksgiving Preparations

 

Bath salts for the turkey brine

Thanksgiving is this week! Whaaaaat that means I really need to finish up my Christmas gifts that I plan on making and also start ordering things that are gonna take a longer time to ship. 

I was up visiting family a week or two ago and my mom made a turkey and it was in the salt soak and I thought up this comic. Also, I have a salad to prepare for Thursday. Totally not connected to this comic - Mark and I make a really good salad. And desserts too! And we've hosted plenty of dinners at our abode and, to our knowledge, nobody has gotten sick or anything. We actually are both rather good chefs. It's not that hard to know your limits and select straight-forward recipes and just follow the directions. We are responsible for introducing our previous neighborhood to tater-tachos. They are super good - it's just like a taco salad but you use tater tots as the base layer instead of chips. 

Text:
A: Are you ready for Thursday?
L: Yep, I have the bath salts for the turkey brine.
A: Actually, can you bring a salad?

Sunday, November 22, 2020

Chicken Egg Bush Saying

Worth double in the hand

 So many sayings about birds. The blended sayings are "Don't count your chickens before they hatch" and "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush." But when it comes to chicken eggs, I hear some chickens like to hide them all over the place so you definitely want more in your hand than in a random bush. 

Why is this comic so special? WELLLLLLL it's the cover image for True Story Volume IX! Yep, 2020 marks my ninth comic book. It'll be under trees this Christmas. I use Mixbook for my publishing and making books with them is fairly straight-forward and they have lots of deals in October and November, trying to beat the Christmas rush. If you're looking to make anything with photos, I recommend them!

Text:
A: You know that saying about chickens, eggs, and counting...
B: You need more in your hand than in the bush?


Thursday, November 19, 2020

Jurassically Awesome Names

Jurassically awesome

 Those names are really a mouthful. Are you familiar with Archaeopteryx or Ichthyosaurus? Archie (I'm not going to keep spelling those, I'm not sure which is more difficult - spelling or saying them) was a small flying dinosaur and Theo was a swimmer who was recently in the news for a fascinating fossil showing one swallowing a meal nearly the size of itself (it might have choked). 
For some reason, and I know I've said this before, my sisters and sister-in-laws don't take my name suggestions. I think they're great names, with thought-out nicknames, and so unique. But they come up with great names on their own so I guess I can't hold this against them. 

Text:
P: Here are my kids, Archie and Theo.
F: Nice.
A: Our full names are Archaeopteryx and Ichthyosaurus. 

Tuesday, November 17, 2020

Biblical Names on a Theme

Esther and Vashti

One of these names is much more popular than the other. Actually Esther's Jewish name, Hadassah, is probably more popular than Vashti. Nobody really wants to name their kid after the deposed queen. It's always good to know the history of a name before naming a child, pet, or object. If you're unfamiliar with the Biblical story, Vashti is the queen in the first chapter of Esther but the king asks her to do something which she refuses to do, and so she is deposed. Her removal leaves a vacancy which Esther is able to fill, and this elevated position gives Esther the leverage needed to save the Jewish people from Haman's plot. The whole book is an epic, dramatic adventure with sub-plots and intrigue. I highly recommend reading it - it's only ten chapters and one has only three verses and the plot really moves the whole book quickly. 

Text:
A: We wanted Biblical names, but on a theme.
B: So that's why your daughters are Esther and Vashti. 

Sunday, November 15, 2020

Philippian Names

Euodia and Syntyche


Another entry into my naming series - search on "names" to get the others. The passage this is inspired by is Philippians 4:2-3, where Paul (and Timothy) entreat these ladies to get along. Neither of those names are currently popular and there are probably several reasons why. But Euodia seems like a Sherlock-style name. The latest movie, Enola Holmes, gives their mother's name as something similar and now I need to look up what it was - Eudoria. Not quite Euodia, but probably inspired by it. 

Text:
A: My kids are always fighting.
B: What did you expect? You named them Euodia and Syntyche. 

Thursday, November 12, 2020

One Time At Five Guys

 

It's like they don't even know me

A few weeks ago, a group from my church went to a Corn Maize. On the way there, we stopped at our usual Chick-fil-A only to realize they didn't have seating available due to Covid restrictions so we looked where else locally we could eat. We settled on Five Guys and this super helpful conversation happened between me, my husband, and my brother-in-law (both who fully know I'm lactose intolerant). And my husband knows I don't normally eat hot dogs (I honestly can't remember the last time I had one) - kielbasa is so much better. I had a really good wurst last week at a local German place which is know for their schnitzel (but all their food is delicious). But at Five Guys I had a little hamburger with some toppings and the five of us split two fries. 

Text:
Title: FIVE GUYS
L: What should I get?
M: Bacon cheese dog!
N: With a milkshake!
L: You know me so... little. 

Tuesday, November 10, 2020

Sequel to Saved by the Bell

Baptized by the Bell - it's immersive.

 I thought this up before the sequel/reboot was announced and I think my title is better. Actually I just looked this up and I realize I had "Saved by the Bell" and "Boy Meets World" confused but apparently both are getting revivals/spinoffs (also I haven't watched either of the originals or follow-ons). And having the follow-on show called a "revival" is actually perfect for this comic. I kinda want to rework the comic to work it in, but nope just gonna post as-is.
As for the puns, as a Baptist you get baptized (full immersion) after you profess Christ (salvation/saved) and also revivals are a thing that were really popular in my childhood. 

Text:

A: They're making a sequel to "Saved by the Bell" -
B: Yeah, I heard.
A: "Baptized by the Bell"
B: ... no.
A: You'll get totally immersed in it.
B: *facepalm*

Sunday, November 8, 2020

Weather From Alexa

 

I still haven't given her my info but she probably has it anyways


This happened a few weeks ago. I was heading out of the house, wondering if I needed my jacket (that's what I'm holding in the comic), and my helpful digital assistant wanted extra info from me. Really I just turned her down because I was on a time crunch and needed to head out without further ado, but it is Mark's device and I didn't feel the need to be added to it. But I do like when she plays my playlist for me (it's called "For Lauren" and it's from Mark and we can both add songs to it in Spotify). 

Text:
L: Alexa, what's the weather?
A: *Weather update* Also, we have spoken before but I don't know your name. Would you like me to learn it?
L: No thanks, bye. 

Thursday, November 5, 2020

Overheard in a Corn Maze

We're independent - we don't follow the smart people.

Full disclosure that this was scheduled before the election so don't read too much into it. But maybe read a little into it. 

I went with a group from my church to a Corn Maze (or Corn Maize haha) up in PA - Maize Quest. While my group was trying to find our way through the massive corn maze (each group gets a flag and if you're ready to give up you wave it over your head and they come and get you and thankfully we've never had to do that), we passed a group of younger kids who loudly said (while going in the opposite direction of us) "We're independent - we don't follow the smart people!" To our great amusement, because we did not know where we were going. We finally caved and actually looked at the map and figured out we were halfway through and just needed to find a given bridge to make it out and we did! It took about 1.5 hours. That was not our best time, but we had fun. And were thankful for bringing a flashlight because it was getting dark by the end of our quest. I totally recommend visiting Maize Quest and their associated Maple Lawn Farms. They have really good apple cider donuts!

Text:
Title: Overheard in a Corn Maze
Youths: We're independent - we don't follow the smart people!

Tuesday, November 3, 2020

Fake Gnus Part 2

 

That sign says Wildebeests but those are just Jersey Cows. Fake Gnus!

ELECTION DAY: For my American viewers, please do your research and cast your vote!

I don't think we can take any more fake gnus (also I think this joke has been stretched pretty far since I made it into two comics). As stated in the last comic, a Gnu is an African Wildebeest. A Jersey cow is the most generic cow I could find - I was looking for what you'd see back in my old hometown in CT in the fields at the base of my parents' street. The kind that I definitely didn't tip because those beasts are huge and wow those fields are covered in cow pies. Ew. And it's not good to tip the cows - they could get hurt. 

Text:
A: That sign says the enclosure is for African Wildebeests, but those are just Jersey cows. 
B: Fake gnus!

Sunday, November 1, 2020

Fake Gnus Part 1

 

Sheep to cows wearing wildebeest horns: Fake Gnus!

A coworker of mine likes to claim Fake News so after Scrum one day I drew this up. Just in time for the election! Why is it a Part 1? Could there be a Part 2? You'll find out on Tuesday (or by hitting the "Next" button if you're looking at this after 11/3/2020). 

What is a gnu? It's a wildebeest! Have I crocheted one of these from my Pattern Book of African Animals? Surprisingly no, it has a pattern for African Buffalo and I thought that's what a gnu was but I was mistaken. 

Text: 
Sheep: Fake Gnus!
Jersey Cows with slopped horns on their heads: *confused silence*

Thursday, October 29, 2020

Animal Costumes

 

Deer to fox: You cannot make fun of my Bambi costume when you are dressed as Zorro

I drew this after Halloween last year AND stored it in the proper folder AND remembered to check said folder before the holiday passed by again! I feel like I need a sticker or something. Maybe a sticker to remind me to check my holiday folders when a holiday is approaching. The deer's costume would be the spots since adults don't have those but maybe judging from the size it's a little fawn so therefore he did nothing for his costume, and I tried drawing the classic Zorro hat on the fox but it just didn't look right so I left it off. Also totally forgot about the rapier but I'm not sure how I would have worked that in anyway.

FYI "zorro" is Spanish for "fox". I feel like everyone should know Bambi and Zorro but if you don't, please click the links and learn about them. 

Text:
Deer: You can't make fun of my Bambi costume if you're a fox dressed as Zorro. 
Fox: *wearing cape and mask*

Tuesday, October 27, 2020

Ghostly Scare

You nearly scared me to life just now!

 I don't usually draw faces but ghosts need eyes to show they are not just weird bags of some sort, and after I drew the mouth I just really liked how happy he looks. I like both of their expressions. I've considered learning how to draw people better, but I think I might stick with what I know. Or maybe you will see more expressive cartoons in the future! No promises. What would it take to scare a ghost nearly to life? I have no idea.

Text:
Ghost 1: You nearly scared me to life just now!
Ghost 2: *happy*

Sunday, October 25, 2020

Gourds

 

"What's up, pumpkin?" "I'm an acorn squash."

"Either way, you are gourdeous!" 

This is my attempt at drawing a butternut squash and an acorn squash. But the butternut could be more of a oblong gourd because I think I drew it a bit too skinny. I'm pretty sure I've done a comic about a pumpkin being gourdeous but I can't find it just now, so either I forgot to upload it or I didn't label it properly. Oh well. I like gourds! Pumpkins on my porch, squash roasting in my oven, doing some pumpkin carving at some point, Autumn is excellent!

Text:
Butternut: What's up, pumpkin? *heart*
Squash: I'm an acorn squash.

Thursday, October 22, 2020

Tattooed Snake

Not a diamond back, just got inked

 Instead of a snake tattoo, let's flip the story. So there was a book I read (actually listened too because audio-books are great for long car drives) where there was a character (Frank) who could shape-shift into animals kind of like Beast Boy in Teen Titans. I think it would be unethical to tattoo a snake so don't do that but since most snakes are identified by their markings, it would make things quite difficult for those who study snakes.

Text:
A: You're dating a diamondback?
H: No, Frank just got inked.