Duck Mango

 

Sometimes parenting is a lot of guesswork and I mean it's guessing what on earth your child is actually saying. We haven't even gotten into slang yet thankfully but wow toddlers learning concepts is a ride. The conversation pictured actually happened in my car and I could tell she was looking at the picture she had colored at the library so I had to wrack my brain as to what was on the picture (a bunch of summery items) and then what could be misconstrued as a duck and/or mango. 

Explanation: sometimes a kid can think all birds are ducks (like how some people say all sodas are cokes), and "mango" and "flamingo" sound similar so why not sub one for the other.

Text:
R: What this duck - a mango?
L: That bird is a flamingo.

Number Two on the List

 

I mean there's not much else to say about this one. In my defense, we're potty training a toddler over here so bathroom talk is just an everyday subject.

Text:
SP: My constipation is over!
LP: That's number one on my list of things I didn't want to know.
LC: I thought it'd be #2.

Shofar So Good

 

I thought this up at my cousin's wedding reception when I saw my niece standing on a large rock and blowing on a big stick that had a distinctive twist in it. I have only heard a shofar once, and that was back in college when I was leaving my Bible class - I heard a peculiar noise and looked over and there was my future brother-in-law, blowing a shofar in front of his class. Apparently they had waited until the class hour was over so that they wouldn't disturb the other classes, but this meant that many students witnessed this event.

Text:
M: Is that ram's horn working out as a trumpet for you?
P: It is shofar.

Odometer Reading

 

Clearly, since Europeans flip the month and day when writing the date [May 3 is written 3/5 rather than 5/3] then they also flip the beginning and end of the year [2024 becomes 2420]. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. Also, why is "dyslexic" such a difficult word to spell???

Text:
M: The odometer was at 2420, so this year if you're dyslexic. 
L: I think that's how they write the year in Europe.

Literary Baseball

 

And now that's what I'll think the book and team are called. I remember reading it in high school and not liking it, but being forced to do things tends to paint said thing negatively. 

Explanation: the baseball team is the Seattle Mariners. The book is called Silas Marner.  

Text:
M: It's the Orioles vs. the Mariners, so that's Baltimore Orioles vs. -
B: The Silas Mariners. 

No Hare Out of Place

 

My pastor preached on 1 Corinthians 11 last week and he titled his sermon "Not a Hair Out of Place" and that spawned this comic. 

Explanation: "Hair" and "hare" sound the same but mean very different things. This comic plays on the phrase "not a hair out of place" which means everything is in order. And if the rabbits are all back in their enclosures, then things would all be in order. So it works both ways?

Text:
A: Did you get the rabbits all back in their enclosures?
B: Yep, not a hare out of place anymore.

Captcha Fail

  

This is a true story because there was a bug when creating a Steam account from the app that it wouldn't let you pass the Captcha. You had to create your account in the web browser then you could use the app to login. It was frustrating. 

Explanation: Failing a captcha over and over can make one questions their humanity. Maybe I really can't see which squares of the grid have bicycles. 

Text:
M: Did you open a Steam account?
L: No, it convinced me I'm a robot. 

Ruler Ruling

 

I hear that's a perk of being a ruler. You can just measure things because you are the ruler - who are those peasants to say that something is a different size? Or maybe you can just perfectly eyeball any object. I've heard it both ways.

Explanation: Yet again, rulers are a tool used to measure things and also a term for a leader, in this case a princess. I don't have any more ruler comics queued up but you never know, I might need to measure something and instead make a new comic.

Text:
A: I can't eyeball it - I need a ruler.
B: It's 2'x3'. 

Ruler of the Office Essentials

Scissors, you are being divisive. 

Explanation: A ruler is a tool to measure things but also is a term for a leader, i.e. the one in charge.

Text:
S: Why is he in charge? He just measures things.
P: He's our ruler.
R: *existing* 

Ruler Returns

 

Happy Independence Day! I still haven't seen Hamilton but I have listened to the music and King George III has some great songs. 

Explanation: A ruler is a tool to measure things, but it's also a term for the leader of a country. 

Text:
A: I hope this fits and I don't need to return it.
B: If only we brought a ruler ...
KG3: ♬ You'll be back, soon, you'll see ♬

July Fourth Medley

 

Get ready for the Independence Day concerts! We can only hope they pick someone who can truly sing the national anthem because you need a range and it can be done quite poorly. I saw a ranking somewhere of all the singers who've sung the anthem at NFL games and it was rather fascinating. But I don't remember where it was. But this would be an interesting medley to hear - each singer picks a song on the fly based on the last word of the previous phrase. 

Text:
A: ♬ O say, can you see -
B: ♬ See clearly now the rain -
C: ♬ Raining, oh baby it's raining, raining ♬

Day of Birth

 

I feel like if you know this answer, you're faking your identity. But now that I've posed the question, you might be curious what day of the week you were born. I know the day of the week for my kids but not for myself. 

Explanation: When verifying your identity, sometimes the questions are rather specific. Most everybody knows what day of the month they were born, but we don't log the day of the week. I considered asking week of the month, but if you're in the first week you probably know that.

Text:
S: Please verify your identity: on which day of the week were you born?
L: ... what?
S: DENIED!
L: Uh, Monday? [How many guesses do I get?]
S: DOUBLE DENIED!!

No Auto Idle

 

Speaking of new car features...

Explanation: The car salesman is talking about the auto idle system which is what "automatically switches the engine off at traffic lights and other brief stops, eliminating wasteful fuel consumption." However "idle" and "idol" sound the same and can lead to misunderstandings apparently. 

Text:
S: This car has auto idle-
M: NO IDOLS IN MY CAR!!!
L: DOWN WITH BAAL!!!

Car Safety Features

 

Some new safety features in cars are quite intrusive, but many safety features are just nice to have and help you drive more safely (like warning you that someone is in your blind spot). If you feel like this comic is targeting you, maybe reevaluate how you drive?

Text:
*redacted*: I can't stand all these new car safety features - turn them off!!! I don't want it telling me how or where to drive!!!
L: Quick question - would you want to be driven by someone who drives like you?

Car Color Options

 

Well that would be unfortunate. Yes, the drab color name is from a quote from one of the Pink Panther movies. 

Text:
S: Car color options are Radiant Red, Disgusting Drab, or "Color of the Day" which is where we mix up the leftover paint cans. 
M: Yeah, we'll take Radiant -
S: Oops, we're out of red. 

Accent Wall

 

And now when you want an accent wall in a room, you know what kind of decor is needed. 

Text:
A: Around the corner here is an accent wall.
*Lime green wall with signs reading "Howdy" "y'all" "Pa'k the ca'"*

Star Wars Parentage

 

I thought this one up after a message on families (specifically generational faith) - here's the original sketch! You can see how the comic changed slightly when I redrew it digitally.

Text:
Luke, holding head in sorrow: I can't believe that Darth Vader is my dad.
Leia: Forget him - you can join my family. I just found out that my birth parents were a queen and a Jedi!
Title: One realization later...
*both holding heads in sorrow*

Veggie Tales Father Abraham

Happy Father's Day! Especially to my Dad, who is the best dad. And to my husband, who is the best dad to our kiddos! 

For those who don't know, VeggieTales is a cartoon featuring fruits and veggies (Larry the Cucumber, Pa Grape, etc.) and they don't have arms or legs - they just hop around and if they need to hold something it just floats. Also for those who don't know, the song "Father Abraham" is a wiggle-releaser sung in children's ministries and involves moving your arms and legs. And thirdly, I have a Sunday School playlist for my kids on Spotify and there is a version of "Father Abraham" sung by the Veggie Tales characters and it confuses me. 

Text:
L: That makes about as much sense as the VeggieTales singing "Father Abraham."
A: *confused squint*

SV after BotW Part 3

 

After making this comic, I found out that you can make cherry bombs in Stardew Valley. I haven't tried using them on anything, but I don't think they'll work on fish. In SV, there's a fishing mini-game where you cast then try to reel in a fish but it can be difficult. In BotW, you were supposed to fish using something more civilized (even just wading in a grabbing a fish), but someone figured out that you can just drop a bomb in and then gather up all the fish. It was definitely simpler than catching them all individually.

Text:
Title: Playing Stardew Valley after BotW
M: Fishing is difficult.
L: Do you have bombs?

SV after BotW Part 2

 

So in Breath of the Wild, it's very open-world which means you can do all sorts of things at any given time with any given thing. There's usually a way to set things on fire, and that often gets the said thing out of the way. Stardew Valley is a bit more rigid, and while you can hold a lit torch - I'm just realizing that I haven't tried setting things on fire with a lit torch. I'll try that next time. Hmmmm.... it probably won't work.

Text:
Title: Playing Stardew Valley after BotW
M: The plants here are in the way.
L: Set them on fire?

SV after BotW Part 1

 

As previously mentioned, I have started playing Stardew Valley. We do play it on our computers but that's harder to draw so we are taking creative license here to say we play it on our phones. I'm not sure if I've previously mentioned (it's been a while if I have) that I've played a number of Legend of Zelda games, including most recently Tears of the Kingdom but before that Breath of the Wild. I liked both games but liked BotW better than TotK. In SV and BotW, you can clear grass as part of the game. But in SV, you don't get rupees (money) when you do so. You actually use up your energy, which is sad, but you're clearing your land to get resources and space for gardens and such. 

Up next: a few more SV after BotW comics :) 

Text:
Title: Playing Stardew Valley after BotW
M: *clearing away grasslands with a scythe* 
L: Where are the rupees?

Playing Stardew Valley

 

So I just started playing Stardew Valley because my husband recently started playing it and I was intrigued. I share his copy on Steam which means I can only play it if he's not playing a game in Steam which is a bit restrictive but it does mean that I won't waste my time gaming in the evenings if he's wasting his time gaming in the evenings. And if I'm not playing then maybe I'll work on my comics? It's a theory. 

Explanation: In the game Stardew Valley, you can gather resources and one of those is sap. Also, there's a bird called a yellow-bellied sapsucker in real life.  

Text:
Title: Playing Stardew Valley
L: What did you pick up?
M: Sap.
L: Are you a sapsucker?
M: Yellow-bellied. 

Who Calls the DK

My husband plays DOTA2 and I usually crochet or blog (or scroll on my phone) next to him so I hear all the chatter. Dragon Knight is a good starter character so I've heard all his catchphrases many times. One such phrase is "Who calls the Dragon Knight?" and every time I think "this guy really needs better caller id." Will I do more of these "Day in the Life" comics for different characters? There's a strong possibility that I will but I don't have any more planned at the moment.

Text:
Title: DOTA: A Day in the Life - Dragon Knight
DK: Monkey King? Send to voicemail. A text from Marci? How nice. An unknown number?!? WHO CALLS THE DRAGON KNIGHT!?!

Preaching to the Choir

Happy Fridge DayHappy Fridge Day to those who celebrate! Search "fridge" on my blog to see all the comics where I've celebrated in the past years.
Some people take preaching to the choir literally. To each their own? Also I keep spelling "choir" as "chior" but thankfully spell-checker has me covered.

Text:
P: The music director wants me to fill in for him???
S: Yes, Pastor, your lifelong dream of preaching to the choir can come true.

Marry Me Please

 

Bonus: "Won't you marry me?" "Correct." And they both think they're on the same page but they aren't. He thinks she's letting him keep the ring for safe-keeping... 

Text:
B: Can you marry me?
G: Yes.
B: Should you marry me?
G: Doubtful.
B: May you marry me?
G: Unclear?
B: Must you marry me?
G: Rude. 

Carson and Family

 

My brother came up with this one when I was telling him about these kid-sized chairs I got for free but they had names embroidered on them (one of which was Carson) so I put some iron-on patches over the names and presto no more not-my-kid's-names! They looks really nice, the butterfly chair and the dino chair. 

Explanation: Carson is a normal name but also a compound word of vehicle (car) plus child (son). Another name that could follow this pattern would be Traindaughter (and Planechild in the mouseover).

Text:
A: These are my kids, Carson and Traindaughter.
B: *silent confusion*
C+T: *silent resignation* 

Price of Love

 

... But you really should cap how much money you pour into a vehicle. That's what I did, anyway, which led me to sell my beloved first car rather than get the transmission repaired. She just wouldn't start one morning and it was very sad. I had already been gently car perusing, so it wasn't a total shock and I had some options lined up fairly quickly. And I loved my second car! 

Text:
L: I loved my first car!
M: How much money did you spend on repairs?
L: You can't put a price on love!

Discontinued Renegade

 

Sadly my beloved Jeep was hit and totaled (we are fine, thank the Lord), so I am now searching for the next love of my car life. And I have a twinge of sadness every time I see a Renegade out there enriching someone's life. My toddler noticed a green Renegade in a parking lot and said it was like Mom's car, which I thought was a surprising correlation for a three-year-old since mine was a different color. But the Renegade is a more distinct car than a classic sedan. Anyways, I'm sure there'll be plenty of comics once I get a new car. Oh, a bonus panel! 

Explanation: In the Marvel Universe, a character named Thanos gets an important glove then snaps his fingers to make half the people in the universe disappear. In my comic above, I allude to Thanos snapping to remove all the Renegades from the Earth (so not a universal snap, just our planet).

Text:
L1: Why don't you get another Renegade?
L2: They've been discontinued :( 
L1: They're all gone?!
L2: Yep, Thanos snapped them off the Earth.
BONUS:
L1: ... so they might be on other planets?
L2: We can't rule that out.

Stability

 

Wow, you don't realize how many versions there are of a thing until you go to buy one. This is why so many people just buy the same thing they already had, just the newer version. There's too many options otherwise. But when your thing gets discontinued, then the decisions have to be made and it's annoying. 

Explanation: A stable could be described as a tiny barn. To stabilize something means to make it sturdier (more stable), but it could be interpreted as making something more like a stable. 

Text:
A: I told you to stabilize the swing set - why did you build a tiny barn around it?!?
B: :) It's not a tiny barn!

Board of Elections

 

Whether or not you believe in election, there still is a Board of Elections and it's not that kind of election. If you don't know about that kind of election, I am fine with leaving you in your ignorance. It's a very debated topic and it can mean different things. 

Explanation: The Board of Elections is a political thing. The topic of election is a spiritual thing. 

Text:
A: You got something from the Board of Elections.
B: I don't believe in election!

Bored of Elections

 

Happy Birthday Eve to my niece and my grandma!
Please read your official mail - sometimes it has useful stuff in there. Also, don't checkout and be bored of elections - they are important and you should make your voice heard even if your voice seems small. 

Explanation: "Board" and "bored" sound the same, and by the time an election finally happens there's been so much news coverage of all the main angles that it can be boring. 

Text:
A: You got something from the Board of Elections.
B: Sign me up! I'm bored of elections.

Voting Idiocy

 

Happy Birthday to my niece!

I believe the Maryland Primaries are today, so research and vote if you're in a group that does that! Side note - I really like my mouseover on this comic. 

Text:
A: What do you think of the bill?
B: Only an idiot would vote for that.
A: You're that sure it'll pass?

Repost: Happy Mother's Day 2019

 

A repost from 2019! This might be my favorite line from Dr. Seuss, taken from the famous Are You My Mother book which WAIIIIIIIIIIIT it's not a Dr. Seuss book???? But it's shaped just like them??? It's actually a P. D. Eastman book. Today I learned. It was published in 1960, which means it's older than my parents. 

Text:
Baby Bird: I am glad you are my Mother. And that you are not a SNORT.

Ranking Hospitals

 

Happy Birthday to my Brother-in-Law! He's about a year older than me and a few years ago he had appendicitis so ever since I've been wary that my appendix could expire at any time. He probably went to the local General Hospital. There's a road near me named Columbia Gateway but it's abbreviated on signs to Col. Gateway and that makes me think either Colonel Gateway or shorten it further to Col. Gate. like the toothpaste. Also for this comic I was thinking what other ranks could be funny hospitals and realized Private Hospital is a thing.

Explanation: General Hospitals are a thing, they aren't specialist. But also General is a military ranking like Colonel. But I'm pretty sure military hospitals don't rank like that.  

Text:
A: Are they at the Windsor General Hospital?
B: No, the Windsor Colonel Hospital.

Retweet

 

I'm not on the Twitter/X so is it still called retweeting? I have the same name as a celebrity so my ability to get accounts with my name is rather limited and I haven't tried to enter that particular sphere. Also did I draw a chick who should be cheeping rather than tweeting? Maybe. Maybe it's a baby tweety bird that just happens to be yellow and orange. It could happen. HAH I should have looked up what a baby mockingbird looks like, they would be retweeting since they like mimicry so much. 

Explanation: Birds are often characterized as saying "tweet" so a natural progression from that would be to "retweet." 

Text:
Title: Some kids are born leaders - others, however...
Baby Bird: Retweet! Retweet!

Riddle me E

 

At first I didn't get what my man said because I heard it as "you" and I was like "no, that has no 'e's in it!" but then he clarified it as a female sheep and I was befuddled. The expected answer was "envelope" because the letter contained in it is a physical paper like a note also called a letter. But "ewe" sounds like the letter U so now there are two answers. Can you think of any more that qualify? The word must start and end with E and contain one letter (take that as you will). EYE! That's a third answer (sounds like I). Words like "eve" or "ere" don't qualify in my opinion because they contain three letters (i.e. "how many letters does the word "eve" contain?) but an argument could be made for saying the 'e's contain the one letter but that's really breaking down what 'contain' means in reference to a word. 

Text:
L: What word starts and ends with E and contains one letter?
M: Ewe.
L: Envel... wait a minute - that works, too. 

Food Leaf Blower

 

Happy Birthday Eve to my Mark! He's the best. 

So I can't find the link for a food leaf blower, but this item is close. I can't find one for food but there are several on Amazon for keyboards and similar, so they're USB powered and meant to clean off your desk dirt. But I think that would work for food too if you have a converter to charge it near your kid's food. Or you just bring your computer over to the food area and plug it in like that. 

Text:
L: *scrolling on phone* Does Robin need a little leaf blower for her food?
M: *holding a pizza slice* I think I just burned my tongue.
L: Do you need a little leaf blower for your food?

In-laws

 

This realization hit me when I was writing the word "in-laws" recently, I don't remember the context but I wanted to let you all know this factoid. So the next time you're in a conversation and there's a weird lull, you can share this knowledge (and probably make it weirder). "AWS" stands for "Amazon Web Services" and I recommend looking them up to get a nice explanation of what all they do because I am not going to think up a succinct summary of what it is. 

Text:
L: You can't spell "in-laws" without "AWS." 
M: ... I'm not sure what you want me to do with that information. 

Toddler Time

 

I mean, it's all just numbers to a toddler. Saying something happens at two o'clock is meaningless, but saying it's a little bit after lunch means she'll demand it when she takes her last bite of sandwich and that's still a problem, just a different one. Maybe it's like software development, when you eliminate an error message so you celebrate - ignoring that a different error is now showing, that's irrelevant. 

Text:
L: Hmmm, what time is it?
R: Forty-eight!
L: Excellent guess, but it's 2:51pm. 

Many Happy Returns

An early Happy Birthday to my little Robin, wow it's been a few years (literally). So apparently "many happy returns" is from British English and other variants of British but not American. But there was a tv show named that about a returns department manager and that's an amazing title for that premise. There's also a Sherlock mini-episode named that. Who knew.

Explanation: "Many happy returns" is a well-wishing phrase, and some people have many items to return (unknown if the items are happy).

Text:
M: Here are the returns.
L: Are they many and happy?

Blink182

 

True story, except this exchange happened in the car and it was a bumper sticker on someone else's car - but I prefer drawing stick figures over cars, so this is my interpretation based on a true story. Punk bands were very popular back when I was in high school but way back then I just listened to music on the radio and knew nothing about the artists so I'd know all the lyrics and music but be clueless about the band. One way this showed up was when I was quietly singing something around the house and my husband asked "is that Yellow Card or Green Day?" and I didn't have a clue (I don't recall the song so I can't say which one it was). 

Explanation: This is basically like when my grandparents tell each other that all their friends are getting old, what is with that?

Text:
L: That's a Blink182 sticker - how old is she?
M: She looks about our age.
L: ... yeah, that checks out.

Sleep Sack Physics

 

Both of my kids have/had the ability to walk around nearly unimpeded by their sleep sacks (the toddler doesn't wear one anymore but she did for about two years). A sleep sack is like a nightgown that's sealed at the bottom, or a sleeping bag with armholes. They're very nice for when your kid is too small to keep a blanket on and you don't want them waking up cold at night. I don't understand how my kid walks around in one - it shouldn't work, per my mind, but it does. My daughter would walk from her room to our room in the morning like no problem here, just strutting along. Maybe this skill will help them in life somehow...

Text:
M: How did he do that - he's in a sleep sack?!?
L: He doesn't let things like physics stop him. 

Bronze Lining

 

For those unfamiliar with this game, the goal is to have the least points. Oh, a bonus version below? 

You win some, you lose most? I'm pretty sure that's how that saying goes. 

Explanation: The goal in the game is zero or even negative points. 82 is not a good score. But it's cool that 28 and 82 are reverse of each other! Seeing something good in a situation is "seeing the silver lining" so it makes sense that seeing a cool thing that doesn't actually help the situation improve is "seeing the bronze lining." 

Text:
L: Well, that's cool - I got 28 points and that takes me to 82!
M: You found the bronze lining! I got -12.

Man Myth Legend

I'd watch that movie. I just recently watched "The Ballad of Nessie" which is a short film on Disney+ and was a nice little animation. There are many movies about Nessie, so why not make another? I watched a fascinating documentary about the Loch Ness many years ago and I don't recall any identifying info about it other than the summary that there could be a whole school of Nessies deep in the Loch which has so many caverns and a totally uneven floor so you can't use sonar to find what's down there. Also, I made the fake movie title to a similar cadence of the main Narnia book. 

Explanation: "The man, the myth, the legend" is a way of describing a super cool person. If you think of it instead as three separate nouns, then you get a man (the person), a myth (Nessie), and a legend (the thing in the corner of a map that describes what's there). 

Text:
Title: Coming to a theater near you: The man, the Myth, and the Legend
*image of a person, the Loch Ness Monster, and a map with a legend*

Dad's Shoes

 

Happy Birthday to my Mom-in-Law!

So I like to give my toddler options (not show above for brevity but it would have been like "rain boots or black shoes") so I don't just pick one arbitrarily and she has a meltdown because it's the wrong one but if I give her unlimited options she will either (1) pick an impractical one or (2) dither over options for far too long. But sometimes she doesn't like the options I give however that can be fine provided the one she wants is practical. Thankfully in the case above she was just being silly and knew she was being silly so I was able to redirect to a more practical choice. 

Text:
L: Get your shoes on - which pair do you want to wear?
R: Daddy's!

March Madness Giants

 

So my in-laws do a March Madness bracket nearly every year and last year I won! I always pick UConn going all the way and that carried me to victory. This year I stuck with my tradition however many others joined my bandwagon and basically I only had UConn correct after the first two games. So I did not win this year BUT I did not come in last which is where I was until UConn won the big game. I picked my teams alphabetically this year, whichever team was further in the alphabet went further in my bracket, and yeah that was a bad plan. I made an alternate bracket with the opposite strategy, and it did waaaaaay better. I also made an alternate bracket where I picked all underdogs (other than UConn) and that one did about the same as my actual bracket, so that shows how badly I picked. Whoops. One year I picked my teams based on who had a higher scrabble score - I don't remember how well I did then. 

Explanation: There's a phrase "a giant among men" to mean someone really stands out in a good way, and I adapted it for when everyone is over 6' by a good margin but there's one who's sizeable bigger.

Text:
Title: March Madness: Purdue
L: That man is a giant among slightly smaller giants.
M: He's 7'4".