Thursday, September 24, 2020

Uneven Vs Odd

 

Happy Birthday to my Grandpa!

As for this comic, maybe I should have added ties to my figures so you could tell more clearly this is a job interview. Yes, the interviewer is putting the resume in the trashcan. He does not understand non-linear thinking. DOT is Department of Transportation; sometimes abbreviations are regional like MVA vs DMV but I don't think DOT is one of those. Around here it's the Motor Vehicle Administration because Delaware/Maryland/Virginia is DMV (but the MVA has DMV in their urls so....). 

Text:
Interviewee: Instead of "Uneven Lanes", why not just say "Odd Lanes"? 
Interviewer: Yeah, I don't think you're a good fit for this DOT position. 

Tuesday, September 22, 2020

Garden State


 I thought this up on one of our many trips between MD and CT. We try to avoid Jersey, but it's hard sometimes. We also try to avoid the George Washington Bridge but every mapping software is in cahoots with them and steer all traffic through the GWB. It's annoying. One of our drives through NJ, I believe we were on the Garden State Parkway and we had the windows down and that was a mistake. So many power plants. So much stench. 

Text:
A: Why is NJ called the "Garden State" but smells so nasty?!
B: Because it has all the plants.

Sunday, September 20, 2020

Modern Horror Story


 I forget what spawned this comic, but I originally thought I'd come up with a series on it. Still working on the series. I don't recall my cell phone ever ringing - it has been on vibrate its whole life. I'm not overly fond of computers making any alert noises - I have my alarm set to a playlist I made on Spotify and everything else is just vibrate or silent. I vaguely remember my old phone saying "Hello Moto" unexpectedly and I did not like that. 

If this turns into a series, it would be called MHS and would be way better than AHS which if you don't know what that is, you are NOT missing anything. I wish I didn't know what it is but sadly Netflix had it in the opening spot for a while and I never wanted to see it. I'm not a fan of the horror genre. 

Text:
Title: Modern Horror Story
A: This one time, I heard ... my phone ... RING!!!
B: WHAAAAT?!?
A: I don't know how the ringer turned on!
A: I didn't even know what my ringtone WAS!

Thursday, September 17, 2020

Captain America 3


I wrote this one a while ago (clearly as this movie came out four years ago) but I thought I'd post it today because it's the best day of the year and Captain America is my favorite superhero. Why is this the best day of the year? Well, you are just missing out if you don't know. Actually I am missing out if you don't know because that means you probably didn't send me a card or present or wish me anything on social media. Oh well. Drawing the iconic shield was a bit difficult but I was able to use some basic shapes to make it - free-handing was just not working out. 
As a comic explanation, one of Captain America's catchphrases is "Avengers, Assemble" because he's usually leading the fight and that's how he gets his group together. In Captain America 3, stuff happens and decisions are made and due to the decisions that mainly Captain America and Iron Man make, the Avengers team splits apart and it's kind of a low point in their team spirit. 


Text:
Title: Captain America 3: Civil War Summary
CA: Avengers, Disassemble.

Tuesday, September 15, 2020

Toad Stools


 I thought this up when we were looking for stools for our new kitchen - we have a center island which has an overhang on one side that works perfectly for a breakfast nook. We did not find any toad stools but we did get some nice cherry ones from Wayfair that match our kitchen cabinets. We looked at Ikea but the one we wanted was out of stock (actually they had one but we wanted at least two and if you want them to match, you gotta buy them together).
And yes, I know what a toadstool is. Well actually I thought I did - I thought it was a red mushroom with white dots BUT it turns out all mushrooms are technically toadstools. And they got their name because mushrooms seem like a great place for a toad to take a seat. The more you know...


Text:
E: Hello, Chair Emporium, we have the seats.
P: Do you have any frog-shaped, backless -
E: FOR THE LAST TIME we do NOT sell toadstools!

Sunday, September 13, 2020

Hobnob


I thought this up when a coworker was describing some parents at his kid's school but I forget the specifics. I'm not sure if this is the image he was going for, but it's what I got out of it. But I think both a monocle and top hat are needed to truly hobnob. Apparently hobnob just means to associate with or to drink sociably, but in my mind it means a fancy sort of that. 


Text: 
A: Why are you wearing a monocle?
B: I'm off to hobnob. 

Thursday, September 10, 2020

Flash Mob


I was watching CW's The Flash when it was airing (it wrapped up the last season early and who knows when the next season will drop) and thought up this one. The Flash is a super-speedster, meaning his superpower is that he can move fast, and he wears a red suit with a lightning bolt on the chest. A flash mob, per Wikipedia, is "a group of people who assemble suddenly in a public place, perform for a brief time, then quickly disperse, often for the purposes of entertainment, satire, and artistic expression."

Text: 
A: Why are you late?
B: The streets are packed with people dressed in red with yellow bolts on their shirts!
A: Ah, a Flash mob. 

Tuesday, September 8, 2020

The Game's A Foot

 


Happy Birthday to my Mom!

So, I had to look up Sherlock's hat because I couldn't remember where the bills were. I don't recall what sparked this one - I watched BBC's Sherlock way back when it came out with those short little seasons, but I am familiar with his phrases due to pop culture referencing them. Also, The Great Mouse Detective was an excellent take on the stories. 

The key is that Sherlock likes to say "The game's afoot" when he puts together the important clues and runs off to apprehend the villain. I played on that to make a game about feet, so the game is a foot. 

Text:
JW: This game is lame - it's all about hooves and paws and -
SH: *heart*
Game name: "It Behooves You"
Comic title: The Game's A Foot

Sunday, September 6, 2020

Slow Computer Safety

 


So at my last job, one of the reason I left was due to major lag on the network. It was frustrating. I drew several comics about it. I'm glad I don't have that anymore. But currently, when I start up too many servers locally, my computer slows to a crawl. But thankfully we have VMs to play with so we can get everything running non-locally which is quite helpful when you're doing something resource-intensive. 

Thursday, September 3, 2020

Tetris Blue

 

Shades of blue today :) Tetris is derived from the word 'tetra' which means four, and each of the Tetris blocks is made of four squares. And a square has four sides. So many fours!

Hoping we are all moved and unpacked in our house so I can do my usual blog night and schedule more posts for next week - hope you have enjoyed a week of Tetris!

No text, just blue Tetris blocks progressing.

Tuesday, September 1, 2020

Tetris Reds and Blacks

Welcome to September! My favorite month. Double Tetris today :)  

No text, just two Tetris examples, one in warm colors and one in monochromatic. 

Sunday, August 30, 2020

Tetris Awana Colors

 
I have posted this in the past with pencil shading but this time I did bright colors to show the progress of the image. I am a bit busy currently (at scheduling) so this week is just going to be variations on this. 

No text, just progressing tetris blocks.

Thursday, August 27, 2020

Local Children

 

Ending on a local note :) There are towns named Laurel, Glen Burnie, and Arbutus in Maryland. Only two of those are normal names (and the one is usually spelled Glenn). "Arbutus" is pronounced "Are-byoot-us" not "Are-butt-us" but I usually pick the latter because... it's immature. The lady's hairstyle is called a beehive and for some reason the wiki article doesn't mention Baltimore - it is prominently connected with that Maryland city. See HonFest. And the "O" is orange and cursive because the Orioles do that (local baseball team). And in Baltimorese, you call people "hon." 

Text:
B: Are those your kids over there?
C: Yep, that's Laurel, Glen B., and little Arbutus.
B: O my, I didn't realize you're a local, hon.

Tuesday, August 25, 2020

Dirty Kids

 Terra is the Latin word for earth or ground, Adam means ground or earth per the Hebrew word 'adamah', and Clay is a well-known type of dirt, commonly used to make pottery. But all are also people names! And kids are quite expensive I hear. And also quite dirty - have you worked with children? Everything is sticky and you don't want to know why. And what does dirt poor even mean? Apparently rich people had real flooring but poor people had dirt floors, per this site with tons of phrases. I might find some new comic material in there. 

But seriously kids are rewarding and worth it I hear so don't be discouraged by my comic, it is meant to be funny. Having nieces and nephews is pretty fun too. 

Text:
A: Kids are so expensive - they'll make you dirt poor!
B: Have you met my kids? They're over there - Terra, Adam, and Clay. 

Sunday, August 23, 2020

Shrinking or Shrieking Violet

 

Several of my friends are expecting and I am taking this week to focus on excellent baby names and puns! I have done this before, should find a way to group them all together so they can be perused when a name needs selecting.

The real pun is that pansy and violet are interchangeable names for the same flower, and shy people are called shrinking violets. I don't think shrieking violets is a common term, but it should be with some kids...

Text:
A: Little Pansy only has two modes - painfully shy or painfully loud.
B: Ah, she's either a shrinking violet or a shrieking violet. 

Thursday, August 20, 2020

Database Seeder

 

This was an actual conversation between my husband and I, where I was just finding all the synonyms to 'seeder'. Database seeders are quite helpful in multiple ways, he was talking about using them for tests so you know what they are running against (which is helpful with predicting proper test outcomes). 


Text: 
M: So I'm working with a database seeder-
L: Oh, a Jewish meal?
M: No, that's Seder.
L: Oh, a half-goat man?
M: No, that's a satyr.
L: Oh, -
M: IT'S a THING that SEEDS the DATABASE with data. 

Tuesday, August 18, 2020

Convoluted Bicycle

 


I wrote this one a while ago when I was doing more wordy comics and experimenting with typing as that's the only way to get this many words on a comic, but I think I made this one too wordy because it took me a few read-throughs to get what I was saying. The car like the Flintstones was moved with the passengers' feet walking on the ground, paddle-boats have peddles so you aren't just kicking in the water, and usually commuting vehicles are smaller since it could just be one person. 

Text:
A: What if you had a car like the Flintstones but more like a paddle-boat on wheels so you don't walk on the ground while driving and also for commuting so just for yourself?
B: That's called a bicycle.

Sunday, August 16, 2020

Pocket Items

 

Yes, that is a reference to a poem, a reference to a book, and lastly a reference to the current state of affairs in the world. I remember memorizing that poem as a kid - it must have been in the Abeka elementary curriculum. I watched the Hobbit trilogy as it came out and I think it's time to rewatch the regular trilogy, specifically the Fellowship of the Ring since I haven't seen that one in quite some time. We might have it, but all of our DVDs are packed up for the move so we can't quite access them. 


Text:
Teacher: Class, name something you keep in your pocket.

A: a poem

B: a ring?

C: a politician! 

Thursday, August 13, 2020

Playing the House



When playing against the house, you know who's going to win. But maybe the house is only good at playing poker, and they don't seem to be playing poker (it was too busy to add a tennis net into the frame). Maybe the house has a saying for all games. I was going to say sports, then remembered that poker isn't a sport, but you can play competitively and there are championships so.... maybe the definition of "sport" needs to be revisited. 
When I was a kid, we would play tennis against the barn - bouncing back and forth. I guess the house does always win like that. Unless you break a hole in the barn, but then you still lose when your parents find out. But that never happened so all is well :)
Speaking of houses, we should be closing on the selling of our house and the buying of our new house today, so that's why the house is in the comic today. It has a busy day ahead. But I am scheduling this post a few weeks in advance so I hope nothing slips coming up to this date. I would like to be done with the whole buying and selling a house thing. It's kinda exhausting. I want my stuff unpacked. But I'm very grateful for my amazing husband handling all the things with this. 

Text:
A: You don't have a chance again him.
B: *about to serve against the house*

Tuesday, August 11, 2020

Oh Deer



So sports.... are they still happening with all that's going on in the world? I hear they are, but there's less of them. Will there be just as much talk about them? Will there be less of a demand for them and maybe that industry will shrink a bit? Should you put baseball caps on woodland critters? Probably a no to that last one, but the others are debatable. 
I do not have an O's cap - I just have an R cap from back home. I found it on the side of the road when leaving the mall with my mom and I washed it twice and I'm not sure if I've ever worn it - it just hangs out in my vehicle. But I do have an O's shirt which is quite comfy when the weather gets a bit cooler. 

Text:
M: Oh, deer.
*Deer wearing an Oriole's cap*

Sunday, August 9, 2020

Weigh Anchor



I have had this comic around a while so I don't recall the origin, but I feel it was a sermon where the speaker mentioned something nautical off-hand and this comic happened. Which weighs more, fifty kilograms or half a ton? I would have to look it up. Oh, about 900 kilograms in a US ton. So those two estimates in the comic are quite different. The more you know.... 
I feel like I looked this up way back when I wrote the comic and tried to make them similar but failed. Maybe I meant to write 500 kilograms vs half a ton - that would be much closer than 50 kilograms vs half a ton. 

Text:
C: It's time to go. Weigh anchor!
F: I'd say it's about 50 kilograms.
S: No way, it's gotta be like half a ton. 

Thursday, August 6, 2020

Let us Discus Shot Put



My college had Field Day once a year and it was all the classic Olympic track and field events like long jump and sprints and such. One year I signed up for it because while I'm not the most athletic (I really don't like running so my two P.E. classes were ice skating and broom hockey), I figured shot put and discus should be fine because what are the odds that any current college student would know how to do this? The odds were very high for non-American students apparently. But some Tongans were very friendly and showed me how to throw the surprisingly solid ball and disc and I totally failed but that is expected when trying something for the first time against people who know what they're doing. But it was fun! I would do it again and probably fail just as badly. 
My college did not have all the track and field events; I think there was a very good reason we did not do the hammer throw. That just seems like a bad plan to do with minimal training. 
The pun here is that to talk about something is to discuss it - if you wish to throw a disc in an Olympic event, that's a discus. 

Text:
A: What are we doing for fun this weekend?
B: We can discus tonight?
A: I'd prefer shot put. 

Tuesday, August 4, 2020

Dragging Lizard



This interaction happened at my in-laws. It took the onlookers a moment to get the pun. Haha, 'dragging' sounds like 'dragon' and that's cooler than a lizard. But seriously, this heat wave is just sucking the energy out of everybody except those people who actually like the summer and better be enjoying this because I am not. I totally prefer winter. Or autumn. Or even spring. Just not summer. But I am very grateful for fans and air conditioning and a cool basement which is where my home office is so I can stay cool and calm and collected. 

Text:
N: I'm dragging tonight.
L: Better than being a lizard?

Sunday, August 2, 2020

Giggle Pickles



Welcome to August! Is it still super hot out there? Probably. 
You know you want to try this out at a phone store. I realize the Apple employees have blue shirts and that lanyard thing and not a visor but I have simple drawing skills and some things like lanyards don't look right on my stick figures so I improvised. 
Giggle Pickles is a reference to gigapixels, which is a measurement for high-resolution images, and phones have cameras which take photos, and that's the link. You want at least two barrels of them :) 

Text:
Banner: Apple Store
A: How many giggle pickles are in this phone?
B: ... a barrel?

Thursday, July 30, 2020

Wedding Birthday



Woohoo! Our anniversary is this weekend. I have scheduled this over a week in advance and I don't know what we plan to do for our anniversary. So many rules currently with the Pandemic so it's hard to know what's open or what the rules are if they are open, so we need to research to find out where we can go and have a pleasant time. 
This is a throw-back comic because I drew it a while ago, have had the file on my computer for a while, and apparently keep missing it the one time a year I can post it. But I got it this time! I like hand-drawing comics for cards, but I like digitally drawing comics for my blog since I don't have to do the scanning and cropping part. 

Text:
A: Happy Birthday to your wedding!
M: We have a word for that. 

Tuesday, July 28, 2020

Password Frustration



This one is based on an interaction when my amazing husband was trying to open an account for something real estate related and the site had obnoxious rules. He did not go with markmark, as he just can't be that lame with his passwords, but in the end he realized they would email you your password in the clear if you forgot it, so yeah. 
If they can email you your password in the clear, that means they are storing in the clear somewhere, which means someone can break in and get all the passwords in the clear and use them for nefarious purposes. "But this is a lame site that just gives me access to someone else's data, like government plats, and isn't my info so it's fine" - no it really isn't, because people tend to reuse their passwords so if someone gets that user@place.com has "fluffyBunny" as their password (oh wait, that's 11 chars so too long for this site), there is a high likelihood that one could use that username/password combo on a social media site or bank site or company site and get in and get whatever is desired. It's a problem and in this day and age there is absolutely no reason to store passwords in the clear / email passwords around. If you forget your password, it should instruct you to pick a new one. 
So on the safety side, if you are making a login for a site that will email you your password if you forget it, pick a unique password that you do not use anywhere else. I mean, you should be picking unique passwords for all of your accounts but it's human nature to be lazy and reuse so I say in this case specifically, do not reuse. 

Text:
M: The password must be eight to ten characters with no special characters!?!
L: Guess you have to use your name. But it's too short!
M: ... markmark it is. 

Sunday, July 26, 2020

Chess Cards



We are in the middle of selling our house and buying another and we are doing both at the same time and there are a lot of pieces moving. My amazing husband should have been credited in this comic because it is nearly a quote by him. His brother's response was "Yahtzee", to quote an excellent skit by Studio C from a while ago. If you don't know the skit, please click the link and watch it. The Yahtzee part is about four minutes in but the skit is only five minutes or so total - it will be a humorous break for your day. 
We are very grateful to God that things are going smoothly (at time of writing, clearly, since I don't have the ability to see how things will be going when this posts but I am trusting that they will continue with minimum bumps). We have a new house, we have a buyer for our house, and our sellers have a new house to move into, and there are rent-backs going on but they seem to all be cooperative with each other. Can't wait to be all moved in (should be by September) and hopefully will not have that one room that holds all the boxes that don't get unpacked for years. And then we don't plan to move again until we die. This real estate thing is just stressful. 

Text:
M: It's like a chess game, you have to play your cards right.
N: *confused*
M: And then you just roll the dice. 

Thursday, July 23, 2020

Too Phony



After writing this I had to look up, is that actually how you spell phony? And indeed it is. Is it related to a phone? I don't believe so. I looked up the origin but all I got was 19th century of unknown origin. So maybe it's related to the phone - I cannot say either way. I don't recall what prompted this comic, probably I heard someone use the word 'phony' and I thought, what if you called a phone phony? That's usually how my trains of thought go. I did an old school phone like my parents had/have (not sure if they still have it) - it's corded but I didn't draw that and also it's a yellowish-ivory color. It's not actually a spin dial one, it just looks like it but you just push the buttons rather than spinning them around with the end of your cigarette holder like Cruella de Vil does in the animated 101 Dalmatians. And now I have to look up how to spell her name because that's not one I use very often. 

Text:
Phone: Why can't we be together?
Stapler: You're too phony. 

Tuesday, July 21, 2020

Not My Type



I think I have a similar comic where one letter compliments the other on their accent, but this time it's font types and the easiest way I can do fonts is to use print and cursive. I know there are lots of strong feelings about teaching cursive and I think if you feel that strongly about it, maybe teach your kid cursive on your own? Or maybe don't teach your kids cursive and let us use it as a secret language when we are old. Not like they will make a text reader to decipher it, oh wait, hmmmm maybe write cursive pig latin yeah that will totally work. 

Text:
Text letter 'b': Sorry, you're not my type.
Cursive letter 'b': I see. (written in cursive but I don't have a cursive font here)

Sunday, July 19, 2020

Phishing Trip



I am a software engineer who has worked in security for years and I have nearly been caught by a well worded phishing attempt (when you get a malicious email that looks nearly legit and you desire to click the seemingly innocuous link only for it to do nasty things to your computer), possibly more than once. They sometimes are super easy to spot (spelling errors, pretending to be from a company with whom I do business but not from that email, pretending to be from a company with whom I don't do business, ...) but other times they either seem like they're from a legitimate source or like the comic, they have a touching or heartwarming story that makes you want to read more or give to a cause. 

Text:
A: So this unsolicited email tells a heartwarming story and there's a link to the video at the bottom - 
B: NO

Thursday, July 16, 2020

Fishy Help



I forget what inspired this one, but I feel like it was not work related because my team is very helpful. It might have been a home situation where Mark needed assistance but I was occupied - that seems likely. The fish bowl is inspired by the one I had for my beta fish nearly a decade ago. Omega was our first and only pet so far. He had colorful rocks at the bottom of his vase. His vase was taller and a bit narrower than this drawing.

Text:
*Fish tank with two fish*
Fish1: Ask someone else to help you!
Fish2: How?

Tuesday, July 14, 2020

Internal Processor



I wrote this over a year ago when work was kinda rough (my company rolled out some changes, my 5-person team became a 3-person team, and I took on more responsibilities due to both) and this is how I felt. Things are better now. I'm still an internal processor. It's hard to get the words out when I need the time to know how I feel and how to arrange the words and then sometimes the opportunity is gone. 

Text:
Manager: I appreciate that you're not fazed by all these changes at work - good job being calm and handling things smoothly!
L's thought bubble: I am an INTERNAL PROCESSOR!!!
L: Thanks!

Sunday, July 12, 2020

Showers with a chance of Blessings



We were listening to the radio and when the weather update was given, they said there was going to be showers, and Mark and I both added OF BLESSSSSSINGGGGGGS and didn't hear the rest of the weather report. I was going to try to draw the person listening to the radio but I figured a TV was clearer that it was a weather forecast. 

Text:
Weatherman: And tomorrow, there will be showers - 
Mark: OF BLESSINGS!! *music notes*

Thursday, July 9, 2020

Sheep Uprising



This was inspired by our trip to Ireland a few years ago - one of our tour guides mentioned how the sheep liked to break through the hedges and get all in the road and stop the cars and he described it as a 'sheep uprising.' Our tour times always had a caveat for sheep uprisings, cause if they were blocking the road then things were gonna be delayed. We did not see any sheep uprisings and also we had a great time over there. So much history and beautiful vistas and such nice people. 

Title: After the latest uprising through the hedge
Ram: This breakthrough is all thanks to ewe!
Ewe: The ramifications are huge!

Tuesday, July 7, 2020

Stuff on Sail



I thought this one up a while ago and it took a while to finally draw it out. I like the boat in the distance to show where the sail is from. What's on the sail? Possibly pirated stuff. You just never know what you could find when a pirate sets up a beach shop (I would say having a yard sale but it's not a yard and it's not on sale). I wonder if he'll get any customers. Who is even on the beach nowadays? At current writing, most things are closed but hopefully more things will open up and people will defeat the virus once and for all!

Text:
Sign: Stuff on Sail -->
Pirate standing on a sail, surrounded by goods: Why do people think it should be marked down?

Sunday, July 5, 2020

Wholly Holey Holy



I'm not a fan of cheese since I'm lactose intolerant (I know there is less lactose in harder cheeses but really it's not worth the stomach ache to figure out if I can eat something and also there are plenty of alternatives at Wegmans so that's quite excellent) but I am a fan of puns, the more the better :) Swiss cheese has holes, but why and also are there other cheeses that have holes? CultureCheeseMag has the answer! But BBC has a different answer but it isn't peer reviewed. Also there are many cheeses from Switzerland (we visited there a few years ago and they talked about their hundreds of cheeses) and several of them have holes. 

Text:
A: Why did you bless the block of Swiss cheese?
B: So it can be wholly holey holy cheese!


Thursday, July 2, 2020

I Don't Know How To Respond In This Type of Situation Part 6



True story, this happened at a previous job and I did not know how to respond. I think I just smiled and sat there. I do like keeping my trash can clean because it just seems more orderly - if you have something like chip bag then you can put smaller wrappers and napkins and such inside it then you just have the one piece of garbage and that's satisfying for some reason. 

Also, Happy July 4th Weekend! I hope you have a refreshing time.

Title: I Don't Know How To Respond In This Type of Situation
Text:
Janitor: Wow Ms. Lauren, you have the cleanest trashcan in this office!

Tuesday, June 30, 2020

I Don't Know How To Respond In This Type of Situation Part 5



I have had this happen many times and I never know how to respond. Yep, they're plain as the.... glasses on my face. Or the nose, which is supporting the glasses. I guess people just want to make conversation, and I just want to avoid conversations. It's a battle. 

Title: I Don't Know How To Respond In This Type of Situation
Text:
Hey, you're wearing your glasses!

Sunday, June 28, 2020

Instant Pot



I got an Instant Pot for Christmas from my grandparents and I like using it but it does not work this way and it'd be kinda cool if it did but it is excellent for many meals. Getting back home from Christmas was interesting because I wasn't sure how TSA would handle it being in my checked in luggage but they were fine with it and all was well. And now I can cook rice and hard boiled eggs and so many thing so easily. But actually we put the Instant Pot out in our POD because we're trying to keep the kitchen clear and open but it's easily accessible so that's nice. 

Text:
A: How are you going to make the soup?
B: I got one of those fancy pressure cookers - it should just... appear.
A: ... That's not how the Instant Pot works. 

Thursday, June 25, 2020

Knight with a Shining Armoire



How many people know what an armoire is? Probably even less people know how to spell it. My spell checker doesn't even know. It's making me doubt my previous spelling which was based on a previous search. Now Google probably thinks I want to buy an armoire. I don't - we have plenty of furniture currently. In case you are thinking it's just a wardrobe - there's a difference. But the one definition encapsulates the other - an armoire is a type of wardrobe (but conversely, a wardrobe is not necessarily an armoire). In "The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe", the titular wardrobe is more specifically an armoire. And a closet is even more broad of a term than wardrobe. The more you know...
Also, it is 6 months til Christmas!

Text:
Princess: Why are you polishing that closet?
Knight: I heard you like a knight with a shining armoire. 

Tuesday, June 23, 2020

Tracking Shoes



I saw an ad a while ago that was for sneakers that had a tracker in them for this purpose (the exercise purpose, not the criminal one) and I thought this up right away. It basically is an ankle bracelet that tells people where you are. I have thought about getting a bracelet that does some tracking but then I think, do I really want to be tracked? But there are nice features like the health things, tracking your heart rate and sleep patterns and such. And also, I have a smart phone so it's tracking me anyways. But it's good to think about security - should you be posting when you're out and about? Probably it's fine, provided you know where you're sharing it (just friends, not randos on the internet). But I'm not comfortable with a tracking shoe. To each their own?

Text:
Jogger: My new TRAQ shoes keep track of my steps and logs where I've been!
Criminal: Cool, I am probably getting an ankle bracelet that does the same thing.

Sunday, June 21, 2020

Small Shallow Groups


I saw a skit a while ago that mentioned Small Shallow Groups (as opposed to Adult Bible Fellowships, which are meant to have a small group go deep in a topic together) and that inspired this comic. To take this into the business realm, how would you answer the question when posited during an interview? Now I kinda want to ask it in my next interview. They usually ask about strengths and weaknesses, and I guess stating your greatest strength is kinda like stating your biggest security. 
On the topic of icebreakers, my amazing husband and I started watching Avatar: The Last Airbender (the tv show) on Netflix and we like it. Why is this related to icebreakers? Well, in the first episode, there is ice and it breaks and people meet due to that. I like a good visual pun. 

Text:
Facilitator: In our Small Shallow Group, we like to start with an icebreaker. Today's is - what is your biggest security?
A: My looks
B: My job
C: My car
D: My charm

Thursday, June 18, 2020

The Ploszaj Way

Dinner is almost ready and we need to leave five minutes ago. It's the Ploszaj way!


It's the way I grew up :) I thought this comic up one of the times I was visiting home and there was some chaos. My mom makes amazing food and sometimes it takes longer that expected (except we now expect it so it's a paradox) so we don't leave the house in a timely manner.

Text:
L: Dinner is almost ready and we need to leave five minutes ago.
A: It's the Ploszaj way!

Tuesday, June 16, 2020

Hold That Thought


Just like horses, thoughts should be held

Just like horses, thoughts should be held? I thought this up probably in Awana, the kids ministry I normally volunteer at during the school year but we go off the local school schedule so it was cancelled early just like everything else.
It's hard to hold thoughts. They can just slip away and disappear. It's annoying when the really good ones do that. That's why I have a note on my phone for all the random comics I think up - have to jot them down before they get away. But sometimes I'm too brief with the note and then late I look at it in confusion wondering what on earth I was thinking. 

Text:
Teacher: I'll take questions in a minute, so hold that thought. 
Child: *holding thought bubble*

Sunday, June 14, 2020

Lost Sheep Pie


Alternate take on Luke 15

We are reading through the Bible with our Sunday class and I thought this one up after reading Luke 15. The shepherd invites all his friends to a party after finding his lost sheep, and as I was raised Baptist then if you have a gathering there needs to be food so clearly if he's a shepherd, he'd make pie. But then it all kinda falls apart when you know the meaning of the parable
I also remember the first time I made shepherd's pie. I was kinda horrified to find that the main ingredient is the cute little lamb. But it's so tasty. 
It's funny how you can remember something incorrectly. I thought there was an episode of Young Hercules where they are in charge of an inn for the day and the only thing they know how to make is shepherd's pie so they convince each table that the only good thing on the menu is shepherd's pie but actually it's chicken salad that they know how to make and convince everyone to order. 

Text:
S: I'm having a party because I found my lost sheep!
B: Awesome! What's for dinner?
S: Shepherd's Pie. 

Thursday, June 11, 2020

Mental Gymnastics


I forget what sparked this one, but I liked it so much and it does make me smile to think of someone actually doing this. It could be entertaining to hold a championship for mental gymnastics, to see the hurdles people can convolute their logic through. I have not heard any convincing cases for Atlanta being Atlantis, but now I'm curious.

Text:
A: Nice medal - what did you win?
B: First place in mental gymnastics!
A: Oh -
B: Atlanta IS Atlantis and here's PROOF! (holding phone)

Tuesday, June 9, 2020

B'more Gotham


So I forget what make me think of this. It's kinda nice working from home because my news feed isn't picking up as much Baltimore news (my office is on the edge of Baltimore so when I'm at work and check the news it tells me the ... different counts). Is their mayor a female? I would have to check. Nope, the current mayor is Bernard Young. The previous mayor was female, but she resigned last year. Too much crime, on all the levels. Not sure vigilantes is the best plan, but hey maybe it'd work?
Baltimore has a nice Comic-Con each year in October. I just checked and it's not cancelled (yet) which is hopeful. We were down in Baltimore for lunch one Saturday a few years ago and saw several Batmen walk past then followed them and found the Comic-Con.

Text:
Reporter: Mayor, what is your plan to tackle crime in Baltimore?
Mayor: We are renaming the city "Gotham" and hoping for the best.

Sunday, June 7, 2020

Personal Wheel Invention


Happy Birthday to my niece!
So I did learn some Greek in high school and yes I went to a Christian school and yes it was to get a deeper knowledge of the Bible and yes, I do think it is kinda helpful. But translations are super helpful, just do your research to ensure it's a good translation. And you can use tools like Strong's Concordance and the BlueLetterBible to help you gain insight into individual words.
Also in high school, I took a missions trip (unconnected to my high school) to Greece (during the 2004 Olympics there which was AWESOME) so I did learn some modern Greek for that so I could say hello and thank you.

Text:
M: Why did you learn Greek in your Christian high school?
L: Duh, so we can read the Bible.
M: But... translations?
L: INVENT YOUR OWN DANG WHEEL!
M: ... ok?

Thursday, June 4, 2020

Linda


My work has a lion mascot and they just bought a company with a panda mascot so if you put those words together then you get Linda which is my mom's name :) She could be the mascot of our joint company! But actually I've seen an image which has both a lion and a panda but they aren't merged like a liger which is just boring. I know you can't (or at least shouldn't) cross a feline and an ursine (haha fancy word for bear) but now I want to draw one. I feel like it could be in Avatar: The Last Airbender since they have things like a platypus-bear (lays eggs when scared) and lizard-parrot and other odd hybrids.
But if you blended the names like is done with the liger (lion+tiger) then technically you'd get landa but that's not fair to both words - I split them more evenly. Wait no, the i is the second letter in both lion and tiger so it could be taken from lion rather than tiger and then it's fair. Glad we got that sorted out.

Text:
lion + panda = mom