Panda Bears of Jesus

 

Toddlers (and some adults) have a tendency to substitute words they know for words they don't. It can be kinda hilarious. As a side note, I have been enjoying watching Saddleback Kid's Stories of the Bible on YouTube - it's very Biblically accurate while engaging yet not being overstimulating. 

Explanation: Parables. The word he was looking for was Parables. Not panda bears. A parable is "a simple story used to illustrate a moral or spiritual lesson, as told by Jesus in the Gospels" per Oxford Languages. 

Text:
O: Let's watch that Bible story!
L: Do you know what it is?
O: Panda Bears of Jesus!
L: Ah yes, Jesus was always talking panda bears with the people. 

Prince of Cinderella

 

I'm thankful my parents did not give me 11 middle names. That would be a bit excessive, but if you look up the names of royals then you will see this is an actual thing with at least European royalty. 
This is inspired by the Rodgers and Hammerstein musical version of Cinderella. We watched it with my kids because it's very low peril - no evil cat (which is the scary part for my little ones). And the 1965 version is honestly delightful. A very chill movie for your viewing pleasure. 
Explanation: In the musical, there is a song titled "The Prince is Giving a Ball" (you should watch it on YouTube to get a feel for the movie) and the prince's full name is given. His parents also have similarly lengthy names. It's a royal thing. In most adaptations of Cinderella, her prince is known as Prince Charming. 

Text:
E: My name is Ella, but my stepfamily calls me Cinderella.
CRWVCAFRLHGJ: My name is Christopher Rupert Windermere Vladimir Carl Alexander François Reginald Lancelot Herman Gregory James, but people call me Charming. 

One Lick No Thanks

 

My two-year-old's personality is really coming out and he's quite the comedian. In a toddler way. And he had to try his hardest to force his licked hand into my mouth. Every time I wiped his hand dry, he sucked on it again to refresh the lick. While giggling. This is why parents are constantly sick, in case you were wondering. The kiddos want to share their saliva. 

Text:
O: *sucking on hand*
O: You want some?
L: No. *sigh* What is it?
O: It's lick!

Give Me Five Cold Germs

True story - toddlers really don't know social etiquette or basic hygiene. 

Text:
D: Good job - give me five! Wait - not the hand that was just up your nose; use the other hand. OK!

Slang Connection

 

I've done a few of these slang posts, but slang keeps changing so I have to keep making more. 

Old posts: 2018 2020 2021 2021b

Explanation: Drip coffee is a thing (when you make it in a pot) that is not not Keurig coffee (when you make it from a little cup thing that gets water poured through it). Something being drip is apparently a good thing per the current slang? 

Text:
A: How do we connect with the youths?
B: Say "this coffee be drip."
A: ... but it's Keurig?

Thanks for Trick or Treating

 

A little late but that's how it goes - I think up a comic, remember to jot down the comic, digitally draw the comic, and eventually get around to posting the comic. I thought about saving this one for next Halloween, but hopefully my kids will be speaking nice and clearly by then. Writing how my kids say things can be difficult. But also can be easy when they actually speak clearly. 

Text:
A: How was trick or treating?
M: I reminded my kids to say "thank you" nice and clearly.
A: And did they?
M: Well, they said "tank oo knife an' cwearwhee!" 

Pattern Following

I feel like this with some cooking recipes as well. I think once you're familiar enough with a skill, you can tweak as you go rather than making the whole thing and trying out changes on the second go-around. 

NOTE: if you do this and it doesn't work out, absolutely do not complain in the comments on said recipe/pattern. Your failure was most likely due to your changes. Follow the directions exactly if you want to see if a pattern/recipe works. 

Text:
Title: Crochet
M: Have you done that pattern before?
L: Nope.
M: So you're going to follow it, right?
L: Also no.

Toddler Back Pain

 

You are telling me what is going on while not telling me what is going on. I now want to use his explanation whenever I have an injury: "my knee hurts because it feels like ow." Also my toddler says "because" with such emphasis like he's about to explain some great truth but then he says a two-year-old thing like yep that's what he is. 

Text:
O: my back hurts.
L: Aw, buddy. Why does your back hurt?
O: BECAUSE it feels like ow. 

Hisnia

 

It was a confusing conversation that spawned this comic. It is funny but also rather frustrating when people see the letters that make a pronoun in a word and change it to their preferred pronoun as if every instance of his/him/her/she in a word is a direct link to a pronoun. Also it took me a minute to remember the male form of her, like him? he? wait use it in a sentence "her bag" would be "his bag" ok I got it. 

Explanation: "Hernia" is a medical condition that also contains the letter group "her" which is a female pronoun. But I just realized "do you see her/him" works as well as "that is her/his bag" so really it could be a himnia. That sounds like a condition related to church songs (hymns). 

Text:
D: You have a hernia.
M: No, I'm a guy. It must be a hisnia. 

Another Tall Order

 

Last month I made some short-order / tall-order comics and here's another for that segment.

Explanation: A tall order is a complicated or difficult thing. A giraffe is tall. Giving the giraffe toy to my son is not difficult, but it is pun-worthy (as most things are). 

Text:
O: I want the giraffe!
L: That's a tall order.
O: *confusion*

Potato Chip Cooking Methods

 

This one came to me when my brother was eating a bag of hand cooked potato chips. Please note in my comic the names of the chips - I am proud of the branding.

Text:
A: I sell hand cooked potato chips. *holding po-tay-to chip bag*
B: Well I sell foot cooked potato chips. *holding po-tah-to chip bag*
A: ew.

Shopping on Target

 

The joys of parenting in the potty training phase. No, this is not a true story - I would not do that to my daughter (and really it would be to myself as the one who would be on cleanup). The true part of the story is where my son sees things in the store and calls out their names so I say "we have that at home" and move on. He now says it back to me (while laughing) when I mention what's on the list and I have to say, "no, we don't have it at home and that is why we're at the story, my dude." 

Text:
L: We are only going to get what we need as we shop.
O: Goldfish!
L: No, we have Goldfish at home.
R: Potty!!!
L: We have potties at home!

Hearsay

 

Happy Birthday to my grandmother! We look forward to our next visit up to see you.
Check your sources, people. This is a true story and indeed, his guess was incorrect. My library gives out hand or book stamps at the end of most story times (there's a booklet to track how many classes you've been to but my kids prefer to get their hand stamped). I don't remember why I drew this as a sticker rather than a hand stamp - maybe it was clearer this way. 

Text:
E: Come get a sticker!
O: Maybe it's purple
R: I heard it's purple.
L: Did you hear it from his guess?
R: Yes.