Al Dente Chicken

This one time, Mark and I were out for dinner and I ordered steak and he ordered chicken and the waiter asked me how I wanted my steak done so I told him, but then he asked Mark how he wanted his chicken done and Mark was not prepared to answer. I think he said 'all the way?' but I think at that point the waiter realized his mistake and probably cringed for the rest of the night. I don't even want to know what al dente chicken would be - apparently it means 'firm to the bite' which would probably mean very overcooked chicken, or possibly burnt? You don't want harden chicken.

Text:
W: How do you like your chicken cooked?
M: Al dente?

Beef Options

Be sure to specify how you want your beef when you eat out for New Years. Do people go out for New Years? Like to a restaurant? I have always been at a family or church party, and there are games and pizza involved, but no restaurants (other than the pizza place to pick up or deliver the pizza).
I think the waiter should be more specific - beef solid could be a roast or steak or tartare (which is actually kinda squishy so maybe not a solid) or many other options.

Text:
W: Would you like beef soup or beef solid?
P: *uncertain*

Sure Thing Babydoll

So this is close to a true story - my amazing husband and I went to Assateague and Chincoteague and between the two we stopped at a little diner for lunch and the waitress was very Southern and used the dialogue above but Mark did not respond wittily because he was just confounded with the greeting. Also I don't remember what he ordered but I got the shrimp and fries and they were good.

Justice is Served

Hare in the Soup

Not sure how you could serve that without noticing... also it'd probably be more likely in a salad.

Bug in the Soup