Complete Games

 

Some games have completion paths (like Legend of Zelda - go defeat Ganon and that's the endgame). Other games are melee based where you select a character and the teams face off against each other (like DOTA2 or Smash Bros) and you can play as many matches as you want but there isn't a big bad that you are defeating - you're more learning the characters and how to best face off against other characters while fighting little battles. Still other games are more open world where you can build stuff and again there isn't an end goal of victory, it's more engineering (I believe Valheim and Minecraft are examples of this). So if you're playing games in the latter categories, there isn't a completion. So I guess one of those is the only game you'll need. 

Text;
L: You shouldn't buy a new game until you complete the ones you already have.
M: WHAT.
L: Go finish DOTA2 and Valheim.

Desserting

 

How sweet?

Explanation: "Dessert" is a sweet treat after a meal. "Desert" (as a verb) means to abandon.

Text:
A: He desserted me!
L: I can tell, by the sprinkles. 

Tripping Like Javert

 

Yep, a Les Misérables reference. I don't recall what brought it to mind, but I was listening to Broadway soundtracks on a recent trip. I agree with the character above that that is a terrible metric. 

Text:
A: HAHA you tripped!
B: Well, I didn't fall as Lucifer fell so I'm good.
A: Sure thing Javert.
C: That is a HORRIBLE metric.

Taking a Survey

 

True story. I don't recall what survey I was filling out but I thought, sure I'll answer some more questions BUT NOT LIKE THAT. 

Text:
Title: Taking a survey:
Q1: Are you open to us reaching out to ask further questions? [Yes] [No]
Q2: Enter your phone number and a team member will give you a call. [Back]
Q1: Are you open to us reaching out to ask further questions? [Yes] [No]

Neck Gator

 

I was in Costco recently and saw that they have their winter stuff out including neck gaiters and I though, hehe neck gators. Now I'm thinking of crocheting a crocodile scarf and calling it a neck gator or crocheting an actual gaiter that looks like an alligator. I'm sure it's been done and I could find a pattern...

Explanation: Alligators (commonly confused with crocodiles) are known as 'gators' for short. A tight infinity scarf is called a neck gaiter. I just learned that gaiters are for your lower legs but now that I think about it, I already knew that from like Peter Rabbit stories or something. 

Text:
A: Why do you have a crocodile around your shoulders?
B: That's my neck gator. 

Mailbox Stroll

 

This is one that I thought up with Robin in mind but it took so long to actually draw that I changed it to Ori. You can tell by the crown color - Robin is gold while Ori is silver. We have one of those mail grids in the center of the street rather than mailboxes at each house (or even in a group). So it is an endeavor to go get the mail. And there are usually leaves and sticks to investigate on the way. I've learned to not be in a rush and just take the half hour for a two minute stroll. 

Explanation: "But" is a conjunction that a sentence hinges on; "butt" is your rear and where a baby wears their diaper.

Text:
L: We need to go for a walk to the mailbox - butt first, let's change your diaper.

Waffling Politicians

 

Sometimes I skip steps in my conversations. I've been using a Krusteaz buttermilk waffle mix but using the measurements from a King Arthur mix and sifting the mix really makes a good difference. They're super fluffy and tasty. Also, making the batter in the morning is way better than making the night before and chilling in the fridge - it tends to deflate in the cold. 

Text:
M: Those politicians keep changing their stances!
L: Oh, we're out of eggs.
M: *confused*
L: They are waffling and I want waffles so I could make the batter BUT...
M: Ah, I see.

Spit Back

 

Based on a true story, this conversation went all over the place and none of those places were expected. I don't think that's how you assert dominance with llamas but you never know until you try? Also I'd like to know the neighbor's thoughts when you have an off-the-wall political slogan sign with a non-election year on it. 

Text:
S: The meat is spitting at me!
L1: Treat it like a llama and spit back - assert dominance!
S: ... treat it like Obama???
L2: I already made the signs. 
Sign: SPIT BACK 2025

Tearable Idea

Halloween disclaimer/warning: today's comic is a little gross so if you're squeamish maybe skip it.

You have been warned.

Proceed at your own risk.

There's not much else to say about this one. I debated posting it for a while then realized it could work for this holiday that's all about icky things. 

Explanation: I'm not gonna explain this one. Just think it through and notice the terrible/tearable pun. 

Text:
A: Holding a baby while wearing dangly earrings is a terrible idea.
L: Yep, tearable. 

Intentional Grounding

And a bonus version:

I sometimes come up with multiple versions of a comic and today's is an example of this. My little one likes to say "uh-oh" for intentional actions and, while cute, is not the proper verbal cue for that situation. Sometimes you need a ref to add order to your life. I've heard of life coaches, but not life referees. There's a market to get into on the first level or whatever they call that.

Text:
O: Uh-oh!!! *threw down his duckie*
L: That's not an uh-oh - that's intentional grounding.
Ref: intentional grounding!

Marble Race

 

This situation has been rectified (in that I have bought marbles). On an unrelated note, my preschooler's half-birthday is today! This means we should watch the "CinderElmo" movie because I recall a scene from it:
King: How old are you?
CinderElmo: three and a half.
King: I now declare you four! 

Explanation: To "lose your marbles" is to not have full control of your mental facilities, and that is how it feels so often when dealing with children (either describing you or them). 

Text:
R: Want to Marble Race!
L: We cannot because all the marbles in this house have been lost. In both senses. 

Nose Sucker Campaign

 

Trying to keep my kids from perpetually having colds is a full-time job. I'm trying to teach my preschooler to blow her nose by putting tissue paper in a cardboard tube and trying to get her to blow it out with her nose but it's a work in progress. Until that skill is unlocked, she must have the alternative used on her. 

Text:
L: The "Say  Yes to the Nose Sucker" campaign is not going well.
M: *pondering*
R&O: No No No No No No No No No No No No 

Tilt the Graph

 

It's an upward curve when you flip it over, like turn that frown upside-down.

Text:
A: How are the sales numbers?
B: We're on an upward trend - just tilt the graph.

Final Meltdown

 

I wrote this one a while ago but it's still very valid. Especially with the toilet training. But it's getting easier with Robin just in time for things to ramp into overdrive with Oriole. Yay. Also I wrote a similar comic back in March so that could be why I feel some déjà vu. 

Explanation: There's a hard rock song "Final Countdown" but I changed the lyrics to be parenthood related. 

Text:
M: It's the ♫FINAL MELTDOWN🎝 *electric guitar noises*
L: Nope, this is probably third out of seven for today.
R: *scream crying*

Manly Bugs

 

Happy Birthday to my brother-in-law! 
The mind of a preschooler is truly amazing. She knows what ladybugs are, and if it's not a ladybug then clearly it must be the opposite. What I think is impressive is that she now knows what lanternflies are and will point them out to me to squash because she knows that's what we do. 

Text:
R: There were bugs outside!
L: What kind, ladybugs?
R: No, not ladybugs.
L: Manly bugs?
R: Yeah, manly bugs.